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The Parables of The Sower
Hypergamy is Monogamy
Published 12/08/18 by Whisper [4 Comments]

Dr. Kitten, PhD, is a useful girl to have around. Studying mainstream western psychology may have taught her all the wrong answers, but it did give her a certain facility with asking the right questions, and understanding the answers without too much difficulty.

The other day she laid this one on me:

“If there’s just a few men who all the women are attracted to, and the rest just get ignored...”

(Jealous as she is of FunSize, FanGirl, and whatever plates she might find out about, she has to admit she’d rather share my attention than have any of the various guys who have proposed to her all to herself.)

“… then is that true of women as well? Are there apex women who all the men want instead of anyone else? And what are they like? How do they get there?”

The answer, of course, is “No.”

Hypergamy is the reason, and it’s much talked about, but rarely understood. Most people think it just means “women are cheaters with an inherent tendency to trade up”.

If you think that, you missed the whole point. Hypergamy actually happens because women are monogamous, and men aren’t.

Here’s how it works:

If I go to a party, and meet a short blonde gymnastics girl with an amazing pair of tits, a tall willowy artistic brunette with super feminine body language, and a waifish Chinese spinner with an infectious smile, I don’t decide which one I like best.

I want to fuck them all. And if I only have time for one, any one of them will do.

But for each of those girls, what matters is if I am the most amazing, jacked, confident, witty, and generally gorgeous man in the room. If I am, they will fight to the death over me, or pretend very hard that I’m not with the other two on nights they don’t see me… rather than give me up.

Hypergamy means that women would rather go home alone than with the second place winner. This is monogamy. When a woman sees a man she desires, she is loyal to him until the moment she sees someone else she desires more… then she becomes monogamous to that man instead.

That may not sound much like loyalty to you, but the brain does not have a slot in it that says “husband”. There is no basic neural encoding of who a woman’s socially or legally expected partner is. There is simply who she is attracted to, and women are attracted to one man at once.

Men, not so much. Almost any man will cheat with less attractive women, solely for variety’s sake. And most of those who haven’t, would if they could. And even those who truly are principled pussywhipped still want to, even if they don’t follow through.

So what is “hypergamy”, really?

Hypergamy = a woman can only sustain attraction to one man at once.

Either it’s you, or it isn’t.

If it isn’t you, hypergamy will make her cheat with him on your marriage bed. It will make her excuse herself to the ladies’ room to send him pictures of her tits, and then come back to the table just in time for you to buy her dessert. It will make her buy a plane ticket to fly to San Diego and suck his dick while she tells you she’s visiting her sick mother.

And if it is you, then not only will she do all that for you behind her boyfriend’s back, but if you are her boyfriend, then anyone 3% less attractive than you might as well be a stick of wood for all she will care.

Hypergamy makes women disloyal… or loyal. Depending on you. Because women are loyal to the man they desire the most.

If you want loyalty, you have to be that man. If you want to break her loyalty, you have to be that man. There is no second place, to women. To women, second place isn’t even the first loser… he’s just one of the losers, and she couldn’t care less.

This is why men are allowed to cheat, and women aren’t. Because women’s nature demands it be so. If a man cheats on his woman, she may be angry indeed, but if she was still attracted to him before he cheated, she still will be after, and the same is true of him to her. But if she ever cheats on him, that relationship is dead… because if it wasn’t, the other man never even would have been visible to her at all.

This is why you should never forgive a cheating woman... because you can't. It's dead already. There is nothing to save. It's also why you should cheat, yourself, if you feel like it. Because if she doesn't forgive you... it was dead already. There is nothing to save.

The price women pay for not having to be the absolute best in the room is that they have to share.

The Great Trad Con, and How Not to Get Conned
Published 11/06/18 by Whisper [0 Comments]

By this time, the only men who don't realize that marriage has mutated into [something ugly](https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2d9k75/the_redefinition_of_marriage/) are the truly stupid, or the delusionally hopeful. Since we are not Captain Save-A-Bro, either, we're not interested in preaching on streetcorners, trying to save idiots from themselves.

But there is a segment of the more clueful who are still making a serious mistake: They agree that Marriage 2.0 is a trap, but **they want Marriage 1.0 back**.

I don't know if it's too many Jordan Petersen videos, or just a yearning for unicorns that they know they won't find, but still believe once existed, but these guys want the 1950s back, despite having not been alive then, and only having ever read about that era through its own propaganda, or that of its fat, purple-haired detractors.

There's a temptation to think that, *if only* we could defeat the *evvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvviiiiiiiiiil* feminism, that ruined everything, we could roll the clock back to an era where everything was easy, you could pluck a unicorn off the unicorn tree, and find happiness (at least sexual happiness) without having to think, struggle, build value, or reinvent yourself.

Well, no.

Oh, here Whisper goes, having a go at the tradcons yet again. What did they ever do to him? What the hell is his problem with the whole business, anyway?

There's two simple reasons:

1. **You can't bring Marriage 1.0 back.**
Neither you, nor the secular tradcons, nor the Jesus freaks, nor all of you together, can resurrect this dead institution. Oh, you could defeat *feminism*. Feminism isn't scary. Hell, all you have to do for that is *wait*, and watch feminism defeat itself. But *feminism didn't kill Marriage 1.0* in the first place. [The information economy did.](https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/4nsl0r/who_killed_marriage_10_trigger_warning_dry_theory/)

2. **Marriage 1.0 sucked for men, anyway.**
Now, we can talk about how and why it sucked, and we will in a minute. *But we don't need to know* **how** *it sucked to know* **that** *it sucked.* All we need to know is that men agreed to destroy it for the (mostly false) promise of a little hairy free-love snatch.

Men saw it, it was available to them, they were intimately aware of what it offered, they watched their parents do it, and *they chose column b*. They didn't want it.

End of debate. But we can talk about why they made this choice, and why, for the same reasons, what modern tradcons are offering you is a shit sandwich on really good bread.

1. **Tradcon women are not submissive to you. They are submissive to the rules.**

Now, during the era of Marriage 0.1, this wasn't really a significant difference, because the rule was "Do what your husband tells you", and if one of your wives was disobedient, you just went and cut yourself a willow switch, and fixed the problem. And there was much rejoicing.
But Marriage 1.0 wasn't like that. The rules didn't say "Obey your husband" anymore. They said "Husband must do A, B, and C. Wife must do X, Y, and Z, and must obey husband... *unleeeeesssssss* he neglects her or his order isn't godly and righteous.".
And who, exactly, decides if he has been neglectful, or his instructions are bad? Why, [*she does*](https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2017/05/24/servant-leadership-in-two-easy-lessons/), of course! That tradcon girl ain't gonna obey *you*, Mr. Alpha Male Badass Person. Even if you do put a ring on it. She's going to obey some guy in a big "I talk to Jesus" hat, who doesn't really care what your priorities are because his idea of a relationship is five minutes alone with that hot altar boy. She's only going to obey you *if and when she feels like it*.
And obedience when you feel like it isn't obedience at all... it's bdsm-flavoured doing-whatever-the-fuck-you-want.
And what consequences can you impose if she does shit you don't like? Funny you should ask....

2. **A Captain who cannot fire a bad First Mate without losing his crew and half his ship is no Captain at all.**
Now, no-fault divorce didn't exist yet in Marriage 1.0, so she could actually be punished for breaking hat-guy's rules. She cheated on you, she got nothing, because hat-guy told her not to cheat. But what about shit *you* want? Well, that Marriage 0.1 willow switch is right out, because hat-guy told you not to. So's dread game, because that's infidelity, which hat-guy doesn't like. And if you decide you need to fire your first mate, because she won't obey the captain, then she gets all the crew and at least half the ship.
Get the picture? You ain't the Captain, bro. Hat-guy is the Captain. The First Mate is *you*.

3. **You are expected to surrender a large part of your sexual imperative for... what, exactly?**
You're genetically programmed to seek out variety. Can't do that anymore, because it's against hat-guy's rules. Supposedly what you get in exchange is love, support, reliable sex, etc. Except hat-guy doesn't mandate those. Perhaps there's some lip service to a wife's "duties", but how are they enforced? What if she'll only have sex with you once every two weeks? Every month? No, you haven't escaped the necessity for running game. You're still in the sexual marketplace. Except now she has a monopoly.
And that's *after* marriage. Before it, well, don't you *dare* expect to test-drive a car before you buy it. Hat-guy doesn't like that, and he's the Captain.

4. **Gotta pay to play. And pay. And pay. And pay.**
Do you really need this explained? Picture the first girl you had sex with. Remember what she was like. Remember what the sex was like. Wanna bankroll her for life, so you can have that when she feels like it?

Now you get the picture. Marriage 1.0 is better than Marriage 2.0 in the same way that a kick in the crotch is better than being stabbed. Marriage Anything.0 is for losers who can't get laid without it, and men so enslaved by their own oxytocin and protective instincts that they would take huge risks with no reward other than seeing her smile.

Don't do it.

Learn game.

And if you want to let her have an LTR, make her earn it, and make sure you can kick her to the curb with zero cost the moment she stops making it worth your while.

Because you're not allowed to give your wife a thrashing anymore. Your only power is the power to walk away. Never surrender it to anyone.

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