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For the #NoNothingNov I failed twice with the youtube watching at least 10 minutes of something not productive. I used snapchat and facebook for probably 5 minutes, and browsed on my phone just scrolling through an article. Most of all of this happening in the morning and evening.
Funny thing is, most of the time I know right before that I should not do these things, but i go ahead and do them. I just have to recognize that feeling and stop the action at once.
As for the rest of my college day it was almost good with the evening/night lacking in effort. I just wasted my time from 8pm-10pm. I could have been much more productive in those two hours. Part of it was that I just was not focused for doing chapter 4.5 (graphing functions the long way) and at 9:15 I wanted to start studying more on Biology but I just... I was out of it
But now that I type that, it appears to me that its just a lazy excuse.
I should have just gotten and done the studying time. I mean I don't have time to screw around. I am in a rather precarious situation, with grades worth everything since I am not the specific college I want to be in.
In writing this I am coming to realize how much of time when I don't feel like doing something or "feel out of it" its just the laziest excuse to quit and be just like everybody else.
Yes breaks are necessary. Perhaps I should try to implement meditating more efficiently into my day so that I don't do this too often.
Also on the Charisma University actions, I only kept at it for the morning. I also noticed I keep interrupting people in their sentences which is something I really need to get rid off.
Other than that tomorrow will be another day in the grind.
Its been changing times for me, and not all for the better. The day I moved out to the university life was the last day I spent at my childhood home. Senior year was a dud with the fall semester of my junior year being the absolute best I have felt at life.
And I just want to reach that feeling again. The feeling of being in control of who I can become. I want to be back in control of how I want to change.
Since coming here at the University of Minnesota, I have not felt myself. I am doing this in the hopes that I see my own faults as to why I am letting myself down. Ever since the winter of my junior year it has been downhill, i stopped doing the things that worked, I stopped working on myself. I stopped trying to improve my social life, I stopped doing the homework (everything including the readings, and beyond), I started being more narcissistic. Only caring about myself and not giving a damn about others.
I am not sure exactly why, but I don't think that should matter now.
Because in about 8 hours a new day will start. And I plan to change one thing at a time.
Tomorrow's schedule will consist of waking up at 6:30am, leave at 7:20. All while listening to "The Laws of Human Nature" and will further plan out my day in the morning. Perhaps I'll post my schedule for the day as well.
I want to start with the day 1 exercise of Charisma University and also implement my new activity. Which is a minimum of 1 1/2 hours of study time for each of my classes.
Maybe through posting this I will be held accountable even if nobody reads it. I'll now it its forever on the internet.