Think about how on-line dating is structured. A girl looks at a few photos and few lines of text, then decides if she wants to meet you. She has access to thousands of profiles and is trying to get the best she can get. At the same time even Chad is willing to least occasionally fuck an average girl, because guys want to have sex with as many girls as possible. This means that even average girls will occasionally date Chad. If that’s the case, she will simply hold out for Chad and reject everyone else. Maybe she will occasionally date someone in her league, but as soon as Chad comes calling she will drop everything to meet him.

This isn’t just conjecture, it’s exactly what the dating data suggests. A data engineer at Hinge, a dating site, noted that 50% of the likes sent by women go to 15% of men. This is consistent with OkCupid data that shows that women find 80% of the men on the site unattractive. That same OKCupid data shows that men rate women more evenly, where about half of women are rated attractive and half unattractive. All this is consistent with evolutionary theory, where women focus on attracting the absolute best, while men are happy dating as many women as they can. A woman can only have one child at a time, so she needs to try to get the best genes possible.

In many pre-modern cultures, a high status man would have a number of wives. Ottoman Sultans were famous for having harems with hundreds of women. The truth is women would rather share a high status man with other women, than have the complete devotion of a low status man. This is seen over and over again in the modern dating economy, where the typical women prefers to be pumped and dumped by Chad than find someone who could actually build a relationship with her. In previous generations a woman may have settled with a low status man because she needed someone to support her, but the modern woman is able to support herself.

So this means that if you’re Chad, life has never been better. Online dating gives you access to unlimited women. But the bottom 80% of men will have to compete for the bottom 20% of women. Melvins can photoshop their profile photos and write witty text game, but it won’t last. As soon as Chad comes calling she’ll disappear. Once a girl is on online dating then she gains access to unlimited Chad, and then it’s all over for Melvins.

The good news is that not all women are online, and you can usually do better in real life than online. It’s much easier for a woman to reject a profile than a person; she will give a bit more consideration to someone she met in real life. Meeting a woman through friends or work also gives you an extra level of social vetting, and an opportunity to present yourself in a complete way. Online dating will mostly be about looks, but in real life you will also be able to show your personality, demeanor, and social circle. You will get a much fairer audition.

In summary: If you’re a Chad, swipe on. If you’re a Melvin, get out and talk to people in real life.

Tip jking for their post.