Patience is a Masculine Virtue

When I look at the situation I’m in now, I’m not exactly where I want to be.

When I compare myself to a year ago, I am amazed how far I’ve come.

When I think of myself two years ago, this is not even a person I recognize.

When I think of myself a year from now, I am excited and optimistic.

When I think of myself two years from now... Well I can't fucking wait.

But I am not naively optimistic, I know that these things take time. My goal is to continue chipping away a day at a time.

It reminds me of a story my old wrestling coach used to tell me about three brick layers. A man walks by and asks each brick layer what they are doing.

The first responds, begrudgingly and condescendingly, “What does it look like? I’m fucking laying bricks.”

The second responds, pragmatically, while looking up at all the space he has to fill, “oh, I’m building a wall.”

The third responds, enthusiastically and excitedly, spreading his hands as if to visualize the immensity, “I’m building a cathedral!”

Everyday you do the right things and the things you are supposed to, you continue building your cathedral. If you look at any particular day, it might feel like you are laying bricks. The brick laying becomes tedious and you won’t see the progress immediately. Only when we keep in mind the bigger picture of what we are doing do we have the strength to continue on day by day with excitement.

It reminds me of rule four from the Book of Pook. Pook says “A man found himself in the company of lovely ladies. Alas, also in company were several men of high esteem. They were more handsome. They had more money. They had more charm. They were better in every way.

But this man knew he had the goods too, if not in such a polished way. ‘I will be patient and let the cards fall where they may.’ Notice that this was NOT inaction or an abrupt slowness. He did not let the lovely ladies’ attention get the best of him nor the success or failures of his competition.”

Pook’s younger self wonders why patience can be confidence, Pook explains that women will come and go but the focus is himself. He is what is infinite, and constantly ascending (maybe not those exact words).

Although this doesn’t exactly line up with what I’m talking about, the sentiment is the same, being able to patiently do the right thing day after day is a fundamental confidence and understanding of what is to come. He is not intimidated by the bravado or success of other men because he knows what lies within himself. He is patient as it blooms further and further out of him.

Without this sense of patience and confidence, it is easy to get caught up in the chase. Any particular girl becomes a chance to prove how far you’ve come. Any particular girl becomes a once in a life time opportunity because you aren’t certain if it will come again. Only when you have the patience to let things fall into place can you let go, feel free to fail and experiment, and not be scared or concerned if things will ever happen for you.

These opportunities only become more abundant with time. What many men forget is that while the value of a woman is INNATE, the value of a man is BUILT. Although women have the opportunity to extend this with various methods of feminine charm and household abilities, like cooking and cleaning, women lose value and expire as time goes on, while men have the opportunity to CONTINUE building their value. They do not have an expiration date because as long as they stay on the path of righteousness, they can continue to go upward. Even more so, as time goes by, more and more men quit, give up, or get complacent because they are tired of laying bricks day after day without seeing results (assuming they even started consciously laying bricks in the first place). These men look for an opportunity to check out and quit working on themselves for a life of comfort. This gives an even greater advantage to the men that understand the truly timeless immensity of what they are doing by pursuing excellence and becoming the best versions of themselves. While others check out, they only go harder.

No matter what they are reading, most men usually at least progress LINEARLY in the first half of their life. They get an education, a steady job, a promotion, and this is where Rollo says the comparative SMV (sexual market values) of men cross with those of women around 30 (the typical age of marriage. Because men are on the ascent, accumulating experience and wealth, women are on the descendent, with their looks starting to fade. Most men think their ticket has come in when women start becoming more interested and jump on this right away with a ring and a piece of paper giving away half of their shit and their future kids.

On the other hand, men like us increase EXPONENTIALLY. This is because we know what we know and what we have to work on, even if this isn't integrated into our abilities yet. We are not wondering aimless through the jungle day after day but instead have a machete, map, and a compass. We go to various places to read up on how to explore and forage and we master our skills and eventually our environments.

Take the most handsome and charismatic natural, without this information he is still worse off because he does not know what he doesn’t know. He is getting battered down by the feminine conditioning of society day by day and does not have the voice that tells him to keep harness on his masculinity energy. I would rather be in the position of a newbie looking at their first red pill subreddit post.

And so, I am happy to lay bricks because I have the bigger picture in mind. I remind myself of just how far I’ve come and with how exponentially fast I am growing I am excited for what’s to come in not only a year, but in a week or a month. Because everyday is an opportunity where I learn something new and become a slightly better man. And for that I look at my goals and say “It’s only a matter of time.”

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