@Lionsmane8 I'm talking about the feeling of belonging rather than the reality of it.
Closeness, yes. But considering the nature of male-female dynamics... Is it feasible to feel intimate -close to a woman without considering her belonging to you? Besides some short-lived arrangements, I cannot imagine many ways how.
There are two male positions regarding having children's and they overlap significantly with the two political positions, right vs left: those that want a woman in order to have children, and those that are prepared to give children to a woman, in order to have her ("as an expression of their love").
There's a third position too, which is the one where you accidentally knock up your girlfriend, and go: "Fuck it. Guess I'll do this now".
"Intimacy" is a sense of "closeness" and not necessarily "belonging" as you describe.
I can "belong" to my tribe or to my socio-economic class, without being "close" to it.
I can be physically intimate with a woman, without being emotionally intimate with her. I don't really feel a sense of belonging with her.
For example, a sexless marriage: the couple belongs to the same social structure (family), but are not intimate with each other.
There are two male positions regarding having children's and they overlap significantly with the two political positions, right vs left: those that want a woman in order to have children, and those that are prepared to give children to a woman, in order to have her ("as an expression of their love").
Which is the fundamental philosophical difference between these two groups, currently eludes me, tbh. It probably has to do with they way they answer the fundamental dread, about death, or something.
In any case, intimacy with your child is a tricky issue, since it can easily end up undermining their true independence.
What's quite certain is that men evolved to have intimacy with their male buddies, and the lack of it can be identified as the greatest problem plaguing the modern man.
Read More@Lionsmane8 Intimacy includes a sense of belonging. That's quite in contrast with "she's not yours, it's just your turn". You need to do a bit of mental gymnastics to turn the latter into the first.
I have accepted the fact that I will likely only get true intimacy through serial monogamy
That’s how it had played out so far
It is not appealing but it works in the short term