@DaxerZone

Beginner here needs help on what to start/materials etc

Hey bros, so very recently I have started to get fed up with my lack of success on the dating market and I came across the RedPill subreddit and then this forum.

I have heard of RP before, but didn't explore it. Now, to provide some context on me + current situation and then finally the questions I wanna ask.

So, I'm a freshly 22year old 1st year master student in AI at a technical university. One of my main issues is the need/craving for connections, desirability. I have an idea as to why this is, and I will try not to phrase it as an excuse: middle school I was bullied to hell by a bunch of my colleagues and I was never able to integrate in the class. I did have friends outside of it, some also in school but never in the class which has damaged my whole perception of validation - I so desperately wanted to be accepted in that class that I tried everything and I was chasing that respect that ofc never came, I craved the spotlight and still do. These years of middle school made me shy to an unnatural degree in school environments, and especially with girls. Then high school came, and some of those assholes from middle school ended up in the same high school where they also managed to fuck up my experience a bit (not as bad as middle school, I wasn't popular but I wasn't a reject anymore) till I got into a fight with one of them and funnily enough that seemed to solve it. The shyness with girls continued, but I started to read some RP stuff and getting some dates and some short lived relationships.

All culminated at the end of it, almost 19 when there was this girl I was seeing and I was about to lose my V-card. Only that I got hit with performance anxiety, and not only I had to deal with the fucking disappoinment I had to also console her/stop her from crying and that has also fucked with my brain. After that I had a few attempts to try again to lose my V-card, not many but same outcome - couldn't fucking get hard for the life of me. And no, I don't watch porn so at least I'm not that low. Problem is these incidents are constantly on the back of my mind, and it makes me more desperate for sex than I should be which is very fucking bad

One advantage I have is my height, I'm 6"5 so I should be having much more success at least based on that fucking thing, but I fail again and again. I do some cold approaches from time to time but they don't feel comfortable to me yet, had a whole bunch of like numbers/insta's but yea as we all know an insta/number doesn't always mean smth. I always have this stupid little voice in my brain saying "oh she's busy, oh she didn't make eye contact bla bla bla". Another issue I have is that I have relatively high standards which combined with the lack of field experience is a shit combination

Other than that, I'm doing fine in life. Hobbies wise I joined a beach voleyball team so I can train for the summer/learn a sport and meet people + a surfing association bcs its a cool thing to do and gives you a more chill vibe (or at least I hope)

One thing I am lacking right now is in the gym department, I am starting on it slowly as I am firmly in the skinny-fat category.

Now, my question to you guys is: what should I do first? Seeing there are so many topics/videos/books what should I start with? What problems could be that I overlooked to mention/ I am completely fucking blind to?

Any help is appreciated

Consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.