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Chantfire

17 hours ago  The Beer Hall

This face seems very familiar.

    

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adam-l

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Eurm

Any advice on how I can clean my wound with the divorce of my parents?

Have a close circle of male friends. This is where men can get support from, ever since the hunter-gatherer's hunter group.

Invest in yourself, not in your relationship. This is probably the hardest, because for men love is naturally self-sacrificial. Use the divorce of your parents as a reminder. Women are attracted to a man that takes good carw of himself, and that's what keeps the attraction going.

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Lone_Ranger

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Typo-MAGAshiv agreed... this is the truth. Far better is to share with a good friend or mens group. They will never use it against you. Look.... you've shared this with some random dudes on an online forum and they're all 100% with you.

I wish I'd realised earlier that you shouldn't share vulnerabilities an self doubt with women partners. They are incapable of not using it for gaining power. It's just biology....women are physically weaker than men so they have to be more manipulative in an emotional sense in order to make up ther power deficit in a relationship.

Men can get a lot out of relationships with women. But there are limits.

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Typo-MAGAshiv

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Eurm sharing that sort of vulnerability is rarely a good idea

It can be done (I have with my wife), but it's usually better not to (I wish I hadn't).

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Eurm

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Typo-MAGAshiv I think you’re completely correct. He was a truck driver and not often at home and I assume that was one of the reasons.

And because of him “thinking” it was a good friend it makes me a little skeptical with my friends too.

Do you think it would be reasonable to talk openly about this with my GF?

Maybe not directly about it tonight because of her ex. But just to make her aware it’s a sensitive area?

It is this again to beta? As you see I’m not a typical red pill guy

Thanks for all your input!

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carnold03

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Eurm

I decided to stay at home tonight and let my GF meet her friends alone.

Now, last minute she tells me that her ex comes and even wants to drive in the same car. I told her that Its not cool driving in the same car and she can go by herself alone.

Although I still feel strange about this whole scenario. This is the first time she will see her ex after a long time and I'm not there.

What should I do?

Asking for advice

+ Btw she told me honestly she didn't know about her ex and it was last minute

That she's telling you that this is going on up front is good. She doesn't want to imperil the relationship with you in the event you find out about this unexpected turn of events later. Unless she's otherwise keeping in touch with this guy, it doesn't strike me as something to be concerned about. However, it does make me think that you need some hobbies for days like these to keep your idle mind busy.

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Typo-MAGAshiv

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Eurm learn from his mistakes. I'm not blaming him for what your mom did or absolving her, but usually unless the woman is just a hobag who can't keep her legs closed, and if the cheating happens only after years together, the man has made himself unattractive. This is usually through complacency and misguided attempts at pleasing the wife that actually backfire ("yes, dear" type shit). The bullshit conditioning and lies we've all been force-fed for the past 100+ years set most men, including your dad as well as my own, up for failure.

with his good friend.

Someone he thought was a good friend. Betrayal of that magnitude is unforgivable.

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Eurm

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Typo-MAGAshiv love it! Thanks, man. I just wrote a comment about my trust issues and it's stemming from that my mom cheated on my dad with his good friend.

I know it's me and I have to work on these issues. But I wonder how?

I appreciate your comment though because you're 100% right.

If she wants to cheat she will. I can't change that. But the fact that she talks openly about it makes me at ease.

Any advice on how I can clean my wound with the divorce of my parents?

My dad passed away lonely and went spiraling downwards after mom left

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RedPirate751

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@Eurm I'm really sorry that happened to you man. It wasn't your fault. Your mom did something fucked up and it hurt you and your family.

Here's something I heard suggested once, can't remember where but its an idea I've tried and it really does help in situations where someone has hurt you badly and you can't seem to get over it. Write them a letter. And I mean really write it, by hand, on paper, and don't hold anything back. In the letter, say everything you wish you could say to them about what they did, how it affected you, ect. Hear me out because I know this sounds wishy washy! Write it all. It might take a long time and that's okay. When you're done with the letter, fold it up and put it in a safe or something.

The point of this is to get it all out of your mind and into the world. You don't have to carry that burden anymore.

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Eurm

about a month ago  The Beer Hall

@RedPirate751 any tips on how can I clean out this wound? My dad got cheated on. My mom left with one of his better friends and it still itches me in my relationships

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