Hey guys, need some help, really appreciate any feedback.
Basically, I (25M) just broke up with my 5 year LTR (25F), who loved me like crazy and would always support me through all my lows including my worst points in physically (health), and even helping me financially when I had a huge problems with my business.
Recently, things have been going better for me, and I have become greedy in the sense that I started cheating with other girls including a really hot 9.5/10 girl. And because of this added with a busy schedule of work and trying to make more money, I just provided lesser and lesser time and attention to my girlfriend. This caused her to become extremely angry, lonely, sad and tired, leading to more arguments and basically her questioning the loss of passion and if I even still love her. Because of all this, I got extremely tired of maintaining the LTR and agreed to some of her viewpoints that we might be on different paths, leading to our breakup. (1 day ago)
After the breakup, I've gone no contact and immediately continued to bang the 9.5/10 chick, but I'm thinking if what I'm doing is beneficial to my life in general or not. Basically, I'm not sure I can train and guide another girl like how I've trained my 5 year LTR to be submissive and to be loving to me anymore. This is because I probably won't be having as much time as before, and I'm worried that letting my current LTR go might be a crucial mistake because I mostly value my career.
Some extra points:
- my LTR had been upset that I told her the truth straight up that I wouldn't able to marry her in the next 2 years
- I've actually known her since high school, but we got together 5 years ago, and I'm basically her first real boyfriend
- she's overall a joyful girl as long as I give her time and attention, has shown to be kind and appreciative towards me
- during arguments she becomes rather masculine and violent, which I have managed to tune down over the years. but still happens.
- she texted me one day after our breakup saying that "she thought she was worth fighting for" even though she was the one who kind of initiated the breakup, albeit I was the one who withdrew alot of attention for no reason due to work and side chicks.
Overall, I feel like I may have been at fault because I provided her with very little care and attention out of the blue after the increased workload and also the increased amount of side plates. And the recent 9.5/10 side plate may have made me more interested in banging her, leading to less attraction to my LTR. I believe I may have messed up, but I know I might be able to salvage the relationship easily by just meeting up with my LTR and bringing back a positive mood, as that usually works somehow. But I'm not sure what's the play here, and what's the most ideal scenario for me moving forward. (side note: my LTR has been busy with her own career, and is close to hitting the wall, not being as fit as before and slowly turning unattractive for me. I have lost alot of attraction and am not sure if I can regain it. However, I appreciate her that she's actually trying to work towards a future and to have a family and kids with me.
I'm so stuck and lost in what I want myself, and I really need some guidance from men in here who are just more experienced, because I really do not know what is the most optimal thing to do for my own good. Please help me to make a decision. Thanks in advance guys.
Consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.
Read More3d ago TheRedPill
UPDATE: thanks for all the help guys, I fucked the new girl like 5 times in 3 days, and it was great and all. But I felt like I really wasn't honest with myself and in a moment of impulse, I broke up with my LTR. I felt like it was all done in a rush, leading to a new post with a new question. I'm just in a really confused state right now, and don't know what's good for me and my life. It's like a 50/50 and I really want to make the most optimal/correct decision for my life (strategically and for the future). Please refer new post for context
3d ago Ask TRP
Hey guys, need some help, really appreciate any feedback.
Basically, I (25M) just broke up with my 5 year LTR (25F), who loved me like crazy and would always support me through all my lows including my worst points in physically (health), and even helping me financially when I had a huge problems with my business.
Recently, things have been going better for me, and I have become greedy in the sense that I started cheating with other girls including a really hot 9.5/10 girl. And because of this added with a busy schedule of work and trying to make more money, I just provided lesser and lesser time and attention to my girlfriend. This caused her to become extremely angry, lonely, sad and tired, leading to more arguments and basically her questioning the loss of passion and if I even still love her. Because of all this, I got extremely tired of maintaining the LTR and agreed to some of her viewpoints that we might be on different paths, leading to our breakup. (1 day ago)
After the breakup, I've gone no contact and immediately continued to bang the 9.5/10 chick, but I'm thinking if what I'm doing is beneficial to my life in general or not. Basically, I'm not sure I can train and guide another girl like how I've trained my 5 year LTR to be submissive and to be loving to me anymore. This is because I probably won't be having as much time as before, and I'm worried that letting my current LTR go might be a crucial mistake because I mostly value my career.
Some extra points:
- my LTR had been upset that I told her the truth straight up that I wouldn't able to marry her in the next 2 years
- I've actually known her since high school, but we got together 5 years ago, and I'm basically her first real boyfriend
- she's overall a joyful girl as long as I give her time and attention, has shown to be kind and appreciative towards me
- during arguments she becomes rather masculine and violent, which I have managed to tune down over the years. but still happens.
- she texted me one day after our breakup saying that "she thought she was worth fighting for" even though she was the one who kind of initiated the breakup, albeit I was the one who withdrew alot of attention for no reason due to work and side chicks.
Overall, I feel like I may have been at fault because I provided her with very little care and attention out of the blue after the increased workload and also the increased amount of side plates. And the recent 9.5/10 side plate may have made me more interested in banging her, leading to less attraction to my LTR. I believe I may have messed up, but I know I might be able to salvage the relationship easily by just meeting up with my LTR and bringing back a positive mood, as that usually works somehow. But I'm not sure what's the play here, and what's the most ideal scenario for me moving forward. (side note: my LTR has been busy with her own career, and is close to hitting the wall, not being as fit as before and slowly turning unattractive for me. I have lost alot of attraction and am not sure if I can regain it. However, I appreciate her that she's actually trying to work towards a future and to have a family and kids with me.
I'm so stuck and lost in what I want myself, and I really need some guidance from men in here who are just more experienced, because I really do not know what is the most optimal thing to do for my own good. Please help me to make a decision. Thanks in advance guys.
Read More1w ago TheRedPill
hi guys, i have a question to ask and i need help with a complicated situation.
i’m currently in an LTR with a girl who’s honestly a 7/10 with slight issues with her temper sometimes. but she’s overall a very supportive girlfriend who’s been through my lowest points in life.
right now, it’s been almost 4-5 years already, and i know i can trust this girl wholeheartedly. however, right now i’ve recently met a girl who’s a solid 9.5/10 who’s shown a lot of interest in me as well.
to be honest, i’m just confused on what i should do moving forward. i value my LTR but the attraction is fading and my current GF is not doing her best in keeping herself in shape. i also have a busy lifestyle so i might not be able to provide the ideal marriage life that my LTR is hoping for anymore.
do i have an option to “have my cake and eat it too”? or is it better to stick to the LTR (which i don’t hate)? or is it better to end things? i have a tough time making a decision on my own side. mainly because my current GF has shown extreme loyalty in multiple occurrences during my lowest points throughout our LTR.
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