Quality, not quantity.
@IBelieveInTheFallen First of all, if you are not confident in general, then you need to work on your confidence before you start debating which venue will be better for you. Monk mode exists for a reason. Whatever you think your short come is, fix it. The only caveat here is that some guys use this to try to achieve something impossible and keep postponing approaching until they achieve their impossible goal. You do not need to have a six pack to start approaching. But you should be in a good shape to maximize results. Six pack is just a bonus.
If your issue is social awkwardness, you are not ready for cold approaching. You should either practice within your social circle or your gym circle or find a disposable new social circle (this would be my recommendation) first and practice there. Do not worry about your reputation here. If you go for the disposable social circle, use it as your experimentation circle. Of course, don’t abuse anyone. Fake what you would like to be until you make it and become that. Second, online dating is mostly for quantity. You can build your notch count there easily, if that is what you want. Some guys have to go through quantity before they can adopt a quality mindset. Some don’t. Some guys do not care about quality at all. They just want quantity. Your approach will be different for different scenarios.
Third, most attractive (and in-demand) girls do not even bother with online dating. They are already in demand. Sure, they might create an account and fish for compliments and look for a thrill or a ONS every once in a while, but they do not look for a relationship there. If they are looking for a ONS, they pick the men like they would pick a drink in a free bar: they look for what they cannot usually afford, which means, by definition, you are going to be shooting way below your league. Women who messaged me online would not ever think of making a move in real life. Similarly, girls I was not supposed to get online were easily attainable in real life. If you are getting better results online than in real life, it means that there could be something wrong with your personality.
Fourth, women do not look for “equal”. They want “better”. If you want to cold approach, take my advice and never chase girls. Do not jump through hoops for any of them. The point of shit testing is to determine whether they are above you or below you. If they think you are above them, they will be interested. If they think you are far above them, they will chase you themselves. Learn how to make girls chase you. Sure, this is not easy. Sometimes this requires an unnatural level of confidence and a max ZFG mentality. Cold approach with the intention to improve your charm. Talk to everyone. If she is in a group, talk to the entire group. Get them on your side and then ignore her. She will qualify to you herself.
Cold approaching brings an image of the lone gunslinger to most people. No. If you want to be good, you need to win the crowd. Once you win the crowd, the girl will come to you herself. Women are pack animals. If you chase them, they will make you jump through hoops. If the crowd acknowledges you, they will jump through hoops to get you. As you very well know, women break rules for alpha and make rules for beta. Win the crowd.Read More
@moorekom The very fact that regular girls (note that 60% of women over 20 in the USA are overweight, and only 21% of women in the USA are age 20-29) "does not register and might not even exist" for you means that the women who do meet your high standards are elevated above regular women.
Maybe it's more accurate to say that younger, skinnier, less slutty women are standing at ground level for you, and you've tossed all other women in a hole.
Are you not confident in bumble or are you not confident in general? Can you cold approach a random chick, whether she is alone or with a friend, but cannot handle bumble?
Online is far easier in terms of effort. If you cold approach for 3 months and build your charm, you would not even take bumble seriously. Online Dating would be far too boring to even bother with.
As @Apollo recommended, you should do all of them, compare and contrast, determine what you like best and then how yourself on it. No one can be the best at everything. I personally preferred social game and cold approaching because, at the time, I gave zero fucks. I did not care for quantity. I was just looking for quality.
@moorekom I would argue the opposite. By NOT fucking the slightly chubby chick or the single mom because you “have standards”, or whatever the reason is, you are actually putting young, skinny, slightly less slutty girls on a pedestal. They're really not any better. Or at least not better enough to be worth the hassle if you can fuck some other girl with a lot less effort. Sure, if a hot girl comes along and is down, fuck her, too. Even fuck her preferentially. But don't put her on a pedestal by refusing to fuck her slightly chubbier friend if she's not down and her friend is.
@arakouzo Is that really worth it?
Yes, I was talking about above average chicks. The demographic you described does not register and might not even exist for me.
The bottom line is that whatever caliber of women you can get online, you will get a better caliber in real life, if you're charming and have a tight game. Online could be easy access to lower value women, sure. But not everyone is looking for that.
@moorekom Disagree. Online dating is great for non-chads as long as 1) You're still a little above average looking. Not necessarily hawt, but at least in the "he's kind of cute" range, and 2) You target appropriate women, remembering that almost 60% of women over 20 are overweight, and the average weight and dress size for US women is about 170 pounds and size 14, respectively.
If you're vaguely above average looking and hoping to bed models and hot cheerleaders off of the internet, that's not very realistic. But if you branch out to the slightly chubby but not super-fat, still kind of cute girls, or the 30s and 40s single moms who've kept in shape, online dating is like shooting fish in a barrel as long as you have a job that high school students don't do, and you're not short, bald, or ugly-faced.Read More
Bumble is essentially just like Tinder. You make the first move. It just gives women an added level of filtering. Not only do they have to match with you, but they also have to reach out to your first. Women like that level of control even though realistically it doesn't add that much, primarily because it deters a lot of underconfident guys from bothering with Bumble. Most women will tell you that the quality of guys on Bumble is far better than the quality of guys on Tinder.
I disagree with you about bumble deterring underconfident guys. As a guy who was doing cold approach, online dating and night life for a while, I can tell that most men are better off with social game or cold approach. Online dating is beneficial only for Chads and even then, it is only good for pump and dump. Personally, I had far better results in real life. Personality and charm goes a long way than a model physique can.
Women vastly prefer online dating because of their laziness, fragile ego and their fear of rejection. Bumble helps them have a sense of control. You might know that speed dating where women are seated vs where men are seated produce vastly different results. When they the "quality" of guys is much improved, we have to factor in all of this info and also factor in what she is claiming she is there for vs what she is actually doing.Read More