. Got drinks, paid for it

Don't buy drinks all night. First round sure, after that she can chip in. If not, she makes no investment. No investment = less attracted.

Girls don't want a second date if she feels she "won". She got everything, you got nothing, why would she want to change that or risk it?

You need girls investing time and some money.

Now a week later I suggest a second date. This time cooking food at her place with some wine. She shit tests saying “hmm cooking where exactly”. I tell her at her place as long as she keeps her hands to herself.

Good, but the problem is you've gone from leading with paying for drinks all night to "right, now you do stuff", and she'll hate that because she's gone from winning to paying.

She replies saying she doesn’t think we’re there yet. And it’s too early to invite me to her place.

See, when you start paying, it is extremely easy for her to do the "make him wait for sex" game. And why not, she can play that game with 10 guys, fuck three others, and perpetually profit.

Not sure if she’s interested in fucking but just takes a date or two more,

And that's the trap... "just one or two more dates".

or just uninterested and using me as a provider or for long term prospects.

Either way I’m planning to leave her on read or just a quick acknowledge message.

Look, you can do so much better for yourself here.

Don't try to go from beta provider (buying drinks all night) to "now you do stuff for me". You can't lead with, and sell yourself as a provider and then expect her to do a 180. You put yourself in the provider category, and then you are asking her to provide. It just doesn't work.

Forget gratitude, it doesn't exist with women or in sex.

Better plan:

Tell her "I'll get the first round, you get the next round" as you're getting the drinks. This sets up expectation without friction and leads her into getting the next one. Don't quibble every round or every penny, but she should be contributing financially.

Girls who want to fuck you do not expect you to pay. Girls milking you for every cent will pretend that paying is part of seduction, but it really truly isn't. If she won't buy a drink or two, she has no plans to fuck you.

In her head she may feel "it's a guy's job to pay", this is her brain in provider mode. If she's in hot alpha fun sex mode, then she will not expect your money, so don't put her in that mode.

If she won't pay at all...... it's simple....... fucking NEXT. It's not a shit test, it's a non-starter.

So... first date.... no meals, shared drinks.

Second date "cook for me", so if you're playing the alpha game and you're happy for her to say "no" and ditch her. If that's acceptable to you, then do that.

If you want to fuck her, best to have a middling second date with the option of sex - ie drinks with option of your place. The absolute best plan is to meet at a bar near your house, but "just drop by my house to drop off my coat/bag". Get her quickly in and out of your house so it's easy to go back there later.

In short: don't provide. She must invest. Ditch any that won't. Smoother transition to bed.