Next course of action? Started hooking up with a girl early ~5 months ago very consistently and often, staying the night daily she was only sleeping with me claiming best she's ever had, and that she loves me I've been lying saying I am exclusive to her, but to be fair, seldom was I hooking up with other girls since I had her as my consistent "One Special Girl," started treating her like such is where I went wrong, more purple pilled tactics, frame slipping, started caring about what she wore out, and to where, she was selling me the dream very well. Halloweekend I went full blown beta and was supposed to sleepover at hers and got very upset and essentially crashed out while drunk because my driving scared her and she wanted to wait to see me til I sobered up. wake up the next morning not remembering what I did, it was bad. Yelled at her to kill herself said I'd never see her again in front of her friends, etc. Apologized profusely, but she still wanted space. Said I'd give it to her, and she told me her timeline of forgiveness wouldn't be within mine and that we should focus on ourselves. Accepted defeat. "Focusing on myself," and went out essentially on a double date last night and posted everyone except the girl I was with out of sheer coincidence and she did detective work to see that there was indeed another girl there. It's a birthday outing and I can lie and say she was their friend She messaged me "so much for focusing on yourself" and even edited it to fix a typo. Blocked on socials, but not on iMessage. respond with a question mark and call her back within an hour. Sound like a beta just typing this, but the sex was good and she was very invested. Often driving hours back and forth to see me. Opinions? Focus on myself; work, gym, other girls and this one will crawl back with time, if not who GAF. I'm definitely the prize here btw.