@Redpillpusher

A Reason Behind Females' Worthlessness as Friends?

Earlier, as I was reflecting on the friendships I've had in this life, I thought about the miniscule number of female "friends" I've had. These were friends in the conventional sense, i.e., I was never friend zoned because I never tried to approach them in a non platonic way (they were either engaged or in a serious relationship when we met and always in a "don't defecate where you eat environment").

In every case, these female friends were vastly inferior to any of my male friends (in regards to selflessness, value, rapport, etc.), regardless of how casual those male friends were. This inferiority was so obvious, in fact, that when I had told one of those female friends that male friends were vastly superior to female friends, she paused and thought about it before agreeing. Also in each case, I observed that it wasn't just me that these female friends treated in a sub-par manner: they were subpar friends to their own female friends. They would show selfishness, jealousy, and/or deception to their female friends that would come and go with the seasons until many of them, ironically, only had male friends left who, like me, dealt with them at a larger distance as time went on.

Now, I've hypothesized that the beneficially based reason females make almost worthless friends is because how our society raises them. For the most part, if the average family has a daughter, it's considered a success if she makes it to her 20s without having a baby or catching an STD. As we all know, however, the bar for success for men is set much higher: financial independence and success, following a moral code, etc. Men are expected, for the most part, to abide by some set of principles. We all have seen the stereotypical father-son moment in sitcoms, dramas, etc. where the father teaches his son a valuable life lesson and a tenet of acceptable behavior. There are no female equivalents in mainstream media. Thus, because of the lack of high moral expectations, one can't be surprised that traits that make horrible friends are commonly found among females.

What I would like to know is if any of you think there's a biological basis for women being subpar friends, even to other women. I find it surprising, especially since females are typically more social than men.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pp-f--sloe8

Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion

"Verbal Judo is the classic guide to the martial art of the mind and mouth that can help you defuse confrontations and generate cooperation, whether you're talking to a boss, a spouse, or even a teenager. For more than a generation, Dr. George J. Thompson's essential handbook has taught people how to communicate more confidently and persuasively in any situation. Verbal Judo shows you how to listen and speak more effectively, engage others through empathy (the most powerful word in the English language), avoid the most common conversational disasters, and use proven strategies to successfully express your point of view--and take the lead in most disputes. This updated edition includes a new foreword and a chapter featuring Dr. Thompson's five universal truths of 'human interaction'" --P. 4 of cover.

Improve communication, resolve conflicts, and avoid the most common conversational disasters through simple, easily remembered strategies that deflect and redirect negative behaviour.

"Verbal Judo" is the martial art of the mind and mouth that can show you how to be better prepared in every verbal encounter. Listen and speak more effectively, engage people through empathy (the most powerful word in the English language), avoid the most common conversational disasters, and use proven strategies that allow you to successfully communicate your point of view and take the upper hand in most disputes.

#2004 #VerbalJudo #TheGentleArtofPersuasion #GeorgeJThompson #JerryBJenkins #Books #Audio #Nonfiction #Communication

@Tempsyy

Long time lurker, first post. Need harsh truth from you guys.

Met this girl, Giulia. Older (25, I'm 20). Smart, deep connection, good sex. Started during intense pastry course. Lived close, saw her every day. Became my main emotional support. My mistake, I know.

Problem: she was textbook one-itis for her ex, Thomas. Used "buying weed" as excuse to see him. Always created drama.

The cycle was fucked:

She meets ex, fucks up (cheats emotionally, physically). Comes crying to me, full of guilt. I play the "good guy", comfort her, "forgive" her. I become her emotional tampon. This shit drained me. Anxiety, no sleep. My mission (top pastry chef) was suffering.

I tried setting boundaries. Told her to cut him off. She promised, then broke promises. Classic. I broke it off, went no contact. She showed up at my work, crying, begging, kneeling. Said she loved me. Weak moment, I let her back in on "probation".

We met again. Same shit. Good morning, but then back at her place... the vibe was poison. I felt my power drain. We had sex. It was shit. Full of anxiety. I realized I was her validation machine, not her man.

My action: Cut her off completely. Blocked everywhere. Deleted number. Total ghost. It hurts like hell, but the mental clarity is already returning. I’m on a strict self-improvement protocol now: early mornings, cold showers, gym, focusing 100% on my mission. Rasated my head to reset.

My question: I know I let my empathy fuck me over. I played the savior instead of the prize. How do I prevent this emotional drain in the future? How do I build a stronger frame so a woman's chaos doesn't become my own? Trying to get back on trp, would love to have some posts or guides linked to me.

Looking for raw feedback, not sympathy. Hit me.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtwiAkUj5Go

Better to find out a female you're involved with is incompatible as early as possible, than after several years of marriage with children. The problem is that you sought validation through your relationship with a female pothead. Unfortunately, nothing good ever came of men whose self-confidence was dependent on female validation, especially undisciplined females who use drugs, legal or otherwise. Self-confidence is a result of pursuing and overcoming the various challenges of life. During which time, you come to understand what interests, drives, and motivates you. To that end, I suggest that you get yourself two sheets of paper, a pen, and sit down at a table.

On the first sheet write down a list of things that you've been putting off on the back burner due to work, schooling, or just life in general. It doesn't matter how silly, or stupid the task or idea might be, just write it down. When you're done, take the second sheet of paper, and re-write the items from the first list starting with what you believe to be the simplest, easiest tasks, down to the most complicated.

When you're done with the second list, get to work. The challenge once you've got the list done won't be simply accomplishing them, but not allowing yourself to be de-spirited whenever you encounter difficulty, or failure. To not let yourself be defeated. You'll spend the time to troubleshoot and diagnose the problem, then start over. If you need help, ask. There's no shortage of #books we can recommend that may help you achieve your goal.

Best of luck to you.