@Chantfire Many congratulations. Its life's biggest adventure.
Expect the mother's personality to permanently change in some ways.
A mother is the greatest asset a small child can have. This is the time in life to support her, so she can do a job you could do if you had to but she can actually do easier, with more joy and probably better at first.
Encourage breast feeding, it really is on balance less hassle for all involved, particularly in the early stages, and a better result.
Women get very risk adverse and micro management obsessed about their babies. Accept this is natural but also be the male energy that complements this by simplifying and encouraging that all will be well. It really makes just about no difference if you feed on demand or on schedule (personally I would say on demand but it won't make your kid a loveless loner if you do it on schedule). If you put one or two blankets on the baby or have a rucksack carrier or a push chair, its all the same. I like to tell the story of my brother and his wife getting their first baby. They both have PHDs, they are professional academics. They could not understand why the baby was behaving like it was too hot when the thermometer reading suggested it needed another blanket. Smart people behaving dumb. Baby has internal thermometer, read it. Humanity survived OK before thermometers were invented.
The big secret to raising good kids is that there isn't one. Kids are programmed to develop well by themselves, provided they get enough love and care. It only needs to be enough, they do the rest naturally. Too much done anxiously is actually a worse result than a B grade effort done happily and confidently. What are you teaching the kid? -That "the world is a big scary place you have to be perfectly set up and protected to handle" or "its a cool place, go explore. I will tell you what to avoid. You will soon learn what happens if you don't listen to my advice and the good stuff is all yours". Helicopter parenting is for fuckwits who deserve a Darwin prize. We learn and grow strong by fucking about and finding out while a parent watches gradually less and less.
There are always hand me down clothes and toys to be had. Kids grow out of them, then you hand them down again. Spend your money on something better. Put it in an account for the kid if you like but don't waste it on gadgets and clothes unless they really are game changers.
Playing in the dirt is far better for them than playing with a screen or a perfectly created toy that leads them in learning. Kids will be directed in learning all through their education. Kids' TV is created to hold their attention first, so the TV company can advertise shit to the mother, then educate a little second. Its not really much use except as a substitute to having something better to do. Let them learn to be interesting by being bored and going to discover what they like.
Find out what they like and foster it, don't worry, it will probably not be what you know. Its a great opportunity to learn something new. You will grow too.
When its hard, remember it will all be over soon and then you will miss it.
Read More@deeplydisturbed you know how much I love "Letterkenny", and though I haven't watched that spinoff yet, I plan to.
But @Treadmill is right. 100%.
That, and Shoresy was simping for a single mom. WTF?
A) that dude's response = chef's kiss.
B) Shrekking and Shreknology are the cures for all of soyciety's ills.
See) the pic.
@Lone_Ranger no you are literally projecting about being obsessed with that fat whale Lena Dunham because you are literally obsessed with Lena Dunham because you don't go well in your gypsy camp full of other mentally deranged beings who don't go well.
YOU DON'T GO WELL!
How do you know by looking at a photo, it is a video?
The font etc looks like a standard screenshot from TikTok.
Even if it were just a photo, we couldn't use it due to some of what I went into in the announcement I linked in my removal comment, ie, anyone can caption any photo and make it say anything.
If you can find the original TikTok and sanitize it and host the sanitized version on streamable.com, then please do post it. It would be a good weekend post under "single mom tears".
If I have time later, I might see if I can find it. If I can, I'll even do the legwork and DM you the streamable link so you can post it since it was originally your discovery.
@Typo-MAGAshiv It was a photo, not a video. I copied it from another site. How do you know by looking at a photo, it is a video?
@Chantfire congrats man!
My top tip for the next little while is breastfeeding.
It's FAR better for the child, and its FAR better for the sanity of the parents.
If your wife finds it tricky, encourage her to stick with it. It really makes the nights easier. The baby sleeps better, and so do the parents as a result.
My advice? enjoy this magical time. Prepare yourself for a 'new love'. This is really what its all about. you will never love anyone the way you love this new human.
It took me a while to fall in love with my children. I think that's how it is with the father. but this is a love that will last all your life. it is the meaning of life.
@Typo-MAGAshiv When you are really obsessed with a woman (like you with Lena) you start to see her everywhere.
I haven't sent you a LDAF (lena dunham arm fat) missile for a long time, i think you deserve one?
@deeplydisturbed This seems like a very male fantasy actually. The woman he loves tells him what she wants from him, and when he does it she is impressed and takes him back.
This is what men want romance to be like. If I just jump through enough hoops, eventually she will be impressed and love me the way I love her.
In reality, "I will do whatever you tell me", even if true, is usually not attractive to women, and jumping through hoops is no guarantee she won't simply go for another man. Such a mindset simply turns you into a people pleaser whose fate is to be used up and discarded.

