@redpillschool I never eat out nowadays, it's been a couple years now since I dined in a sit down restaurant. So finally yesterday I took my 80yo Mom out for a late lunch to a "New York style deli/bakery" place. Large nice dining area, bus your own table after they bring your order out to you type of place.

So anyway, we ordered Sandwiches- pastrami and pulled brisket. No sides, no drinks. The portions were good, and the tallow fries and onion rings that come with were delicious. All that said, it was a sticker shock that the bill for this parsimonious lunch for two came to nearly 60 bucks!

Granted it was slow time midway between the lunch and dinner rushes. The place was cavernously empty, 3 other parties total and 3 door dashers who came and went. This was my firsthand experience of the sentiment I keep hearing over and over, that "people aren't going to restaurants any more!"

@Typo-MAGAshiv

Oh Typo. You can do better than that. Here is my two cents:

Buddy: you look like Mr. Bean.

You: Ha! Your mom said the same thing, but it was hard to understand her with my dick in her mouth

(NOTE Do NOT say this if it’s your sibling. Or wait.. maybe… never mind. Don’t)

Buddy: Stop eating so much you ain't gaining

You: Stand up, start walking towards him while unzipping pants. “Oh, Im gaining alright. Wanna see?”

Buddy: You’re a loser

You: Funny - Your wife/gf said the same thing! Remember that time you were (at work, away for the weekend)? Yeah, she said I was a "rude asshole" as I was leaving. She’s funny.

Buddy: You’re gay/fag

You: Well, I never had sex with a man, but there’s only one way to find out. Get on your knees and I’ll tell you after you’re done. I promise I’ll be honest. Just watch the teeth bro.

Buddy: Other random lame insult (use this one very carefully against more insecure types)

You: Does that weak shit work on other people? That’s your best shot? (show condescending contempt and move on)

You get the idea. Typo is rarely right about anything, but he is right about the “agree and amplify” thing. It completely disarms your opponent. And if you take it to the next step, you slap the living shit out of them.

When you go full bore like I did, it sends a signal to everyone watching the interaction that you will be equally vile to them. Most people will not want to fuck with you after that.

If you get someone dishing it back, you found a friend. Sort of like @Typo-MAGAshiv, @redpillschool, and @Vermillion-rx. They are EXPERT ball busters and I have honed my ability to trash talk (within boundaries, mostly) by bantering back and forth with them on occasion. Not every response works, but you can get very good at it.

To the point where I actually agree with them and make some self deprecating joke. Because I am almost NEVER the butt end of jokes like that in real life. So a place like this is a sort of haven. You get your balls busted here and you’re one of us. It’s oddly enjoyable.

Bottom Line: Men who bust your balls are not necessarily your enemy. In fact they can become good friends

PS:

By the way, occasionally you will get a zinger that lands right on-target. And depending on the situation, the best response is…

“Ha! That’s actually a good one”. Smile, wink at the person, and let it go. It shows that you can take a joke and acknowledge when a good joke is actually a good joke.

Now get your gay ass out of here, put the food down, and get in the gym.

Also, your mom says hi. At least that’s what i think she’s saying.

(see what I did there?)