@Typo-MAGAshiv

I have a Great Niece (from Wife's side of the family) that decided she was going to start an OF a few years ago to support herself and Infant Daughter.

She is very overweight (was a the time, things might have changed, although I doubt it) and even her FB image is heavily filtered to the point where it looks nothing like IRL. And, yes, it's just a head-shot selfie.

I don't know how well it went, and frankly do not care as she is all kinda fucked up.

I thoroughly believe she was molested by her Grandfather, which lead to her being promiscuous.

At one point, we were prepared to have her live with us. Her stories about how the Father's family was treating her (she was living with them rent free) did not hold water and we distanced ourselves from her life.

AFIK - She moved back to her hometown, a depressed and depressing area with few job prospects. I can only pray for her Daughter. At least her Great Grandfather is dead, which may spare that Child some of the pain.

Latest update on Friend

He is moved, from a large house with shop to a 1 bedroom with den condo.

So much was taken to the dump, three 5-ton loads plus the couple in my pickup. My Wife and I spent several days sorting through stuff and making piles of trash, donate and items we took ourselves. We did find items that had significance which would have ended up in the garbage if we hadn't gone through the piles and set them aside.

Still has too much stuff and has been picking away at it. The chemo has lowered his energy levels, so progress is slow. He still has the two dog and a cat to deal with because he feels like he would be ruining their lives by re-homing them, yet, their need for constant attention taxes his patience, and he doesn't have a lot of that.

Far as I can tell, he is still angry with his late Wife. Not just because she had kept so much financial stuff hidden from him, we are all sure that she hid her own physical issues from everyone, leading to her sudden death.

Currently, he is angry with his Oncologist, and has told me he is not going to do any more chemo until he gets a different Dr., risky behaviour at best, toddler tantrum most likely. I get that chemo does shit-kick your body, makes you feel drained and messes with your thought processes, however, his decision (IMHO) is reckless. I understand his reluctance to continue and respect his decision, even if I think it unwise. He's an adult.

Still resisting the idea that he NEEDS to get some therapy to help deal with everything that has happened in this year, and the ones leading up to it.

I've tried to gently point out that she's gone, he's free from the crippling debt, still standing and now, any messes to clean are his alone.

I call him every few days, just to check in. I will see him again in December when we go back to spend Christmas with our Daughter and family. I hope he makes some forward progress in both his mental and physically health. Maybe he'll come for dinner.