@ImfacingAmoron

Fwb, almost ltr, going increasingly cold, what to do

The last time we've seen each other, she suddenly wanted to break things off. This happens ocassionally, but the reason is always "You don't love me, I'm not important to you at all". I provide comfort in these moments and things continue as usual, she's submissive, initiating dates etc.

I went on vacation for 7 days and noticed her text less and less as days have gone by. Inb4 text only for logistics is bullshit if a girl is above plate level. It turned into just a few shared reels per day from her, and then she stopped altogether and replied to the occasional reel I sent with "hahaha" or something like that.

This honestly shook me as this never happened in a year and a half of knowing her, she's been bombarding me with messages from day one. I didn't overpursue but invited her to come over when I came back from the vacation. She agreed. Honestly this pullback has me a bit worried, though I recognize it might be a shittest. How to act in this situation going forward?

To answer the question, I think cancelling the date and softnexting for a while might be smart.

It's likely the right move to make. Your gut is telling you something is wrong and it seldom goes well for guys who disregard that. In the meantime, consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.

@n0thing

Broke up with LTR, need advice on getting over it and what mentality to have

This got huge, I'm sorry and thanks in advance if you take your time to read it ??

I read a lot of redpill content after breaking up with my first girlfriend shortly after turning 20yo. Before that, I was extremely blue pill. We broke up because she cheated on me (for a second time) and a week later I was already trying to message her back like an idiot. Thankfully she didn't take me back that time, which fucked me up but it was needed for me to move on and learn.

From there, I started getting better in every way: went from skinny 121 lbs to ripped 160 lbs at 5’7’’, got a job and moved out from parents house to my own place at 21yo, got a high paying job (80k/year) at 23 and a even better paying job (115k/year) at 26 where I still work at. I'm gonna be 28 in a month.

As TRP stated it was going to happen, I became better with chicks by just focusing on myself and progressing in life. I was able to have two girls always ready for sex with me with no strings attached. Got to a bodycount of 20 at 24yo.

Was happy with that life but always missed the "connection" that I had with my first gf. At 24yo, I got to know a woman that was very different compared to the average in her traits, we had a 3 years LTR, the last 6 months I made the huge mistake of letting her come to live with me (failed the iron rule). It went downhill from there and eventually I broke up with her.

Was kinda sad for 2 months but it was easy to "let go". The truth: I never "falled in love" with that girl like I did with my first one. She was not unicorn and I always knew. I just enjoyed our relationship.

When I got better emotionally, I started spinning plates and had 2 girls that were ready for sex anytime I wanted by month 4 post-breakup.

And then, I got to know personally a woman that was a crush of mine since I was a kid. She is 30yo and I'm 27yo. That was a "bad thing" but I didn't care at all because she is the most beautiful woman I ever met. By a large margin. I'm talking about a 10/10 woman, the only 10/10 woman I know IRL: the most beautiful face, with huge natural tits, with good ass, with good body, blue eyes, fuck she's perfect.

On third date I had sex with her and the red pill mindset went to shit. I immediately cut contact with all my plates because this girl gave me hints that she wanted something serious. She had her "party phase" but cut the bs at least 2 years ago and she no longer goes to nightclubs, bars, anything, and she works from home, so she had everything I look for in a LTR candidate.

We started seeing each other A LOT, having a lot of sex that felt magical, I was fucking the woman that I always said was the most beautiful woman I know when asked since I was 17 (never told her that ofc). And we had incredibly chemistry from the start. It washed my mind bad.

3 weeks after first date she's already my girlfriend. (I know, I know...)

She slowly but surely started being more and more controlling with the time, at first I didn't care because everything she asked for I was also getting it in return: by month 2 we had "open phones" policy where I can take her phone and look whatever I want and she can do the same too with mine. (I KNOW!)

To that point, I was real happy still, I presented her to my family, to friends, and even to my work group. I felt my status going higher just by having her at my side honestly. And I was certain about her being loyal, super loyal.

She kept getting controlling to the point where if I didn't answer my phone for 3 hours it was a problem. I had a talk to her about all of that and she understood that it cannot be like that. Or thats what she said. Because she was still making problems for everything. One occasion, I went to the gym and saw an old high school woman friend in there, she went from fat to super fit and looked really attractive, I didn't say anything sensual or anything weird other than (wow you look like another person congrats!), but that was a problem already, not to even mention that girl following me in social media two hours post gym and giving me a like and me following her back with no likes. Made my gf go nuts as if I have done something wrong.

I was starting to feel locked up, overwhelmed. But I was in love with this woman. Being with her was the most awesome thing to do in the world. Even just watching a movie, I was in love, and we always had incredible sex, and her body and prettiness makes it unreal.

Back to the phone thing: I had access to her phone, so, like a retard, I went and checked her conversation with her best friend. From there I confirmed that she was super loyal to me, which was awesome, but also discovered that:

• she has a bodycount of 30 (higher than mine).
• she left the "party phase" as she mentioned to me a long ago, but she was still fucking dudes up to two weeks before knowing me, never at the same time, but she was going from one to another with basically no time in-between.
• I know 7 of the dudes that she has been with.
• The common factor between all the dudes she has been with: They all have a lot of money. I consider myself high money but I'm broke compared to most of those dudes.

That fucked me up in the head. But I wasn't able to say something about it because I didn't have to look at that, and also there's nothing she did wrong being with me (other than telling me she has been alone for previous 6 months before knowing me which was a lie as she was fucking a dude two weeks before me... which is to expect...)

One day I'm working a lot, doing lot of important stuff, forgot to turn off the "don't disturb" mode so I didn't see her messages. Didn't answer for 4 hours. She calls me and starts making a scene.

I saw myself and I noticed: I stopped progressing in life, stopped doing lot of activities I did to spend more time with her, I stopped interacting with other woman basically 100%. And I was in a blue pill relationship again, with a woman that had lots of sex with bunch of rich dudes that never got to be their boyfriend and which some of them are guys I know and have to see from time to time. And I'm paying for 100% of whatever we do together (she makes little money), I also took her to an all-inclusive in Bahamas for a week. I was feeling like the "secure option" for her "settling down".

I said to myself that I was going to start changing to redpill again while in the relationship. At first it seemed to work. I talked her out of the open phones rules, she didn't like it at all but eventually accepted. I started spacing a little bit more our meetings because it was like 5 times per week (she basically slept more in my house than in hers), etc.

But it was still a load. She was my biggest source of happiness, but also she was my only source of unhappiness.

One day she told me that I changed, that she doesn't like it now, that she feels insecure about me because she doesn't think that I wanna have a "100% serious relationship, family oriented relationship like I wanted in the beginning" Up to that part, I was understanding her, because it was kinda true, but then she said "so I think its going to be better to break it off, unless you are willing to commit"

So I told her "you're right... we should break up", she said "so you are not willing to commit?" and I said "If I have to choose right now between commit into a family relationship or breaking up, I choose breaking up. We went too fast and we didn't let it flow enough. I love you and love our relationship but its too soon to commit fully, there are lot of things that we should fix before making a decision like that"

She said then "ok, thank you for everything, I hope you have a good life", kissed me in the cheek and got out of the car into her house. And I left. She immediately removed me from her socials.

That was 4 days ago. We didn't contact each other again. Don't think any of us will.

SO,...

Full posting can be found here: www.forums.red/p/asktrp/324369/broke_up_with_ltr_need_advice_on_getting_over_it_and_what_me

While you're mulling over your options, consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.

@medstudentgerman2002

Who gets the 0.1% women?

I‘m talking about those women who are doing well in life (intelligent, happy, good social status) and look better than 99%. Who do they end up marrying?

I‘m doing well in terms of SMV and expect it to get better into my 30s since I have a good career lined up. Part of me is worried that the really desirable, 10/10 once in a blue moon women will get snatched up by rich fucks who take them on expensive vacations and buy a big house at 30.

Is that realistically what happens? Or do they date the same losers that all the other halfway attractive woman are also dating (honestly based on my few observations so far that’s what actually happens)

Attempt to answer own Question: don’t worry thinking about what women want, you’re the prize. But still, I can’t help but wonder.

The more secure and economically independent a female is, the more her SMV is penalized. For females, having a high IMV, industrial market value, will only diminish that females SMV, sexual market value. This is partly why many high IMV individuals, whether male or female regardless of their SMV, tend to be bisexual.

However, what frustrates most males isn't that females are seeking men who will provide for them. The frustration is that in order to be a father, you must first take a wife. While we currently possess the means to medically discern a child's true parentage, society usually only grants females license to decide who that will be. As such, the challenge for most males is finding females who're sincere in their desire to be a mans wife and mother to their future children.

When you're ready to consider such a journey, study the book. It'll make it easier for you to filter out the females only out to waste your time, energy, and money.

@SwallowMyPill

Caught feelings - how much to disclose

At the core I'm a very sensitive/emotional guy, although I try not to show it. I've tried changing it many times, ignoring it, practice stoicism etc., ocasionally it helped, but it's never changed the fundamentals, so I've tried to embrace it more now

I probably sound like a little girl writing this, but here's the situation

Background on this girl: Started as plate around 1 yr ago, after 6 months time I told her I wasn't sure if we were gonna be more than that. She opened up a lot after that, she had a lot of walls up before it, so after that I enjoyed getting to know the real her. She started growing on me, cooking delicious meals, massage, submissive etc (she did stuff like that before too, but it felt different kind of). We became FWB, I also opened up abt myself more and turned out that we're very similar in a lot of ways, talking with her feels relatable, easy and natural. Regardless I stuck to TRP, talking w other girls n seeing them ocasionally, although it felt different than with her

End of July we were spending a lot of time together, at one point even 2-3 straight days - which I've never done with anyone except my ex, I even preferred her company over my ex. I wasn't seeing anyone else in these weeks either, as I didn't have much desire to do so, sex was truly amazing. Even then I would want to be friends with this girl I've even if it meant being platonic (first time I ever genuinely considered that), so I started to consider the possiblility of LTR this girl (she's made it clear she dearly wishes for it). I was conflicted - I could see potential in her as a life partner, but also still wanted to explore other options and find out if it's what I truly want already, so I decided I was not going to rush it, and give it proper thought.

Start august we find out we got into uni in different cities, althought only 1hour apart, I won't do LDR. So automatically I put my thought about LTR'ing her on hold, thinking possibly in the future if/when she comes back to my city and just leave it there. I still liked her enough to go explore her uni city with her, and watch meteor shower. But still something shifted in me as I knew I had to start pursuing other options again as I won't LTR a LDR.

So I did. Coincidentally date with new girl was pre-lined up, day right after we went to watch meteor showers (spontaneous), and tbh I felt guilty about it, but tried to brush it off. Date went well, made out and planned 2nd date at my place. Day after I went to a festival but ultimately got too drunk and crashed at FWB place. Morning after I'm saying my goodbyes and she feels the condom in my jacket ( we dont use together), and she starts asking questions etc. - I tell her how it is, kind of, and she breaks down saying she thought I wasn't seeing anyone else at this point, if I had feelings for them, or spend time with them like I did w her - which truthfully I didn't, but still was hesitant about saying it. We talk about our relation for a while, and she asks if she was just imagining things, I say that I withdrew myself emotionally when I learned we are gonna start different unis, putting my thoughts abt going exclusive with her on hold, and that even if I was seeing other girls, I could still have feelings and love for her. She broke down again imagining me being with others, and I started questioning it a bit myself, since I do care about her a lot, and what I had been having besides her was seeing girls I had no feelings for - was this worth genuinely deeply hurting her for - this was the first time I truly questioned this, and felt kind of bad, but told myself I couldn't blame myself for it. She cried in my arms and I told her I would miss her and that I enjoyed the time I spent with her. She didn't want our relation to end either, said she had even thought about not starting the uni, even though its her dream education, to try and get into this city next year instead. We left it open-ended and I went home to sleep.

Waking up I thought it didn't change reality that we will be in different cities soon, so I convinced myself not to cancel the date with the other girl which was planned the day after, although I was not looking forward to it. All day I thought about canceling/rescheduling, but end up forcing myself to just do it. I proceed with the date, but was thinking about FWB alot during it, and how much it would hurt her if she knew - I felt sick, but tried to ignore it. After a while we close in for sex, but I felt so off physically, that I struggled to get an erection, both times I got fully hard I lost it, even after penetration. I physically or mentally couldnt do it, I penetrate, shes moaning and everything but somehow I just get turned off. It's just not the same as with FWB, is basically all I'm thinking about. I felt bad for the other girl but I had to send her home and reflect on myself. I felt disgusting for doing this, especially toward myself, forcing sex that I had little desire for. Went to gym to vent some of my frustration and feel better today

With FWB girl decided to just see what happens, we have date plans this week, and I'm hestitant to tell her any of this, but I feel like confessing to get it off my chest, hence this post. I already told her I have feelings for her before, but also that I'm not sure if we'll be LTR. I tried to ignore my feelings for her and be stoic, but in the end it left me feeling disgusting about myself.

Am I overreacting? Should I even feel bad about this other than betraying my own feelings? I never told her that I had fully commited to her - I didn't owe it. Should I give it a few days before even making any plans with her? Should I tell her any of this? I feel like I shouldn't tell her what happend, if anything just the conclusion that I reached from what happenend, that she's the only girl I have genuine feelings for atm, and that she's special to me. Not to gain anything, I wouldn't want her giving up her dream education - when I'm not even sure that I would LTR even if so. But still I would get it off my chest and be at peace?

Hoping that any of your wise input will help me clear/get my head, straight

Fuck this post ended up way longer than I hoped it would

It reads like you could use some help. Consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.