@Durek_The_Bald

@First-light

I think marriage is a shot to nothing for women. They don't have to worry too much if it fails or not. If they fall in love, they are not thinking about failure but they are still happy to know they are "protected" by the union they will be entering.

They can marry and live happily ever after or they can marry, divorce and live in a free house with free money. What's not to like when you know you are weak and emotionally vulnerable and have a craving for security?

Yesterday I came home from a run to find a red Jaguar car on my drive. The car turned out to belong to one of my lady's friends. She had not been seen for several months following her divorce. My lady had wondered whether she might be a fair weather friend. Now however she had snagged a guy with a big house, who was paying her a day's wages every week not to work on Saturdays but to be with him. He had given her the car and an oversized engagement ring what straddled the boundary between taste and vulgar exhibitionism. They were moving in together but Beta's house was on the market because Beta had agreed to sell up and move to the friend's town as the friend was a "Community woman". The "friend" had turned up to crow over her less fortunate friend whose man never gave her a ring or a car and said she should do a little work for some of her own stuff, even if she never had to pay into the housekeeping or bills.

When the "friend" had departed in the new red car, I expressed a concern that new Beta might get burnt. I was roundly scolded. "Women are not marrying to gain things. He loves her and she is happy. Why do you look at the negatives that won't happen not the good things that will? Your heart is mean"

"Yeah I am mean. Experience made me so. This will be her third marriage. She spends money like water. He has not known her a year. She brings nothing. (Her divorce from Tyronne left her with nothing because Tyrone had already spent it on his other women). He will lose everything if he starts to feel that paying for her to drive around showing off is not all he hoped it would be"

Naw. Normal women (as in, without personality disorders) are very much anxious about the prospect of divorce. This is especially true if married to a guy they're at least somewhat into.

This is partly because women seriously believe divorce victimises them, because that's what their minds gravitate towards; victimhood. So most normal women actually go around thinking it's "so hard" to be a divorced woman, and that divorce is "so unfair" to women.

But it's also partly because divorce does in deed suck for people who actually care about their kids, and who had hopes and dreams of a functional family unit - as most normal people probably have, or at least had at some point.

The woman in your story clearly is of a consciously predatory kind. So yeah, it wouldn't surprise me if she knew the ins and outs of how divorces in certain parts of the world actually tend to pan out - and how to take full advantage of it. But most women aren't consciously predatory like that, where they're fully aware they won't be victimised by divorce.

Also, it should be said, that guy is a fucking idiot; Leading with his wallet, throwing cash and gifts around, setting himself up for the beta provider role 100%. So I guess the answer, if one wants to avoid these walking red flags, is don't be an fucking idiot.

Predatory women will always separate idiots from their hard-earned money. It's not even a parasitic relationship, it's symbiotic. The idiot gets to be an idiot.

Not everything is as it seems.

We all understand the idea behind alpha f$%@!/beta bucks for the average guy, but is that what you've actually been seeing among the posh? Have you guys ever taken the time to consider that you might be limiting your understanding of the sort of relationships these people have with each other in projecting your own values onto them? You're assuming the men you see are indeed presumably being fleeced of wealth by females, who themselves work as diligently, as hard for, value, or even accumulate their wealth as you may have yours. I've long considered the marriages and subsequent observed divorces we see in some relationships cover for something else? I really think so, but specifically what that something might be I don't have enough info to do more than notice a pattern and make an informed guess.

It doesn't make any sense in my mind for a man to spend large sums of money on any female who's not their kin, especially a middle aged female nearing the end of her lifetime fertility window with failed marriages already under her belt, potentially hostile children from those past relationships, and the problems they both can bring into a guys life. I can't deny that it's very plausible to think every guy who's being divorce raped by their parting wife, is being so because the woman sought marriage, not to be a wife to a man, and loving mother to children, but in a narcissistic desire to briefly be the center of attention before a few years later executing a wealth building strategy she'd gleaned from a magazine or books designed to dupe them into enriching attorney's and court agents at the expense of a household.

We see this quite frequently among presumably wealthy or high profile individuals. Such that I'm not certain the AF/BB equation is entirely applicable to a lot of relationships among those above certain income levels, or high profiles, unless we're willing to consider that unobserved variables might also be in play.

Whether you agree with the socio-sexual hierarchy or not, there's clearly something these women are in possession of that is of value to these men, such that they must marry them to access to it, and I don't think it's the womans' vagina, fading beauty, or affections. If I had to guess, it would in part be that these modern day courtesans formed networks during their formative university-college monkey-branching years. Networks the men in their lives seek access to. Maybe to improve their business, gain access to investment, but I doubt those would be the only reasons and it's clear they don't marry for the sort the average person might.