Opened up to a girl on a first date
If someone could critique and tell me what I could do better I would really appreciate it.
First of all, I just wanna say that the girl is a 9 and before hand she told me she is depressed and I thought she might be looking for a “connection”. Fucking wrong.
Anyways, we did an activity together and after that I told her lets get drinks. But that didn't work and she took the lead and said lets go a walk. During the walk I opened hoping to find emotional connection with her. I became naïve and opened up to her and DID NOT turn things sexual. Fuck. I believed everything she told me about herself including the white lies (after the date it became clear what the lies were). Then we got in my car and I gave her subtle signs I wanted to kiss her, tries to put me in the friend zone me. Told her I can’t and she was genuinely shocked by this. She tells me we don’t have to be friends and just wants things to be the way they are now. I still refuse. After talking for a bit she leaves.
Later during the night, she calls me and does whatever it take to try and continue to be friends I still refuse. Send me a text saying she likes how I am honest and the way I don’t want to continue and appreciates it. Then agains text me and asks what my impression of her was. Blah blah blah.
I feel like I could have used that to my advantage and do something but beta me was operating. I feel like I hurt her ego but I don’t really care. I cut my losses and moved on.
How can I not become a beta for woman when they are in tough situations, really have to killed the captain save a hoe inside me. What can I improve on. I am more than happy to answer any questions you guys have for me to clarify the story.
You never should've dated her. The chick told you she was depressed, you should've said, "Well, mental illness is no laughing matter. If you or someone you know is suffering from depression please call 1-800-273-8255. There is a brighter life ahead." That or something witty to end the call on before calling and ask out some other gal. Instead, you went full Beta simp mode for a chick you believe is 9 who clearly voiced her lack of interest in you. Your insistence prompted her to charge you a meal and entertainment for her time.
In future, consider investing in a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, also known as the late Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's mirrored on several sites and a podcast. While his media is a bit pricey, it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from, but I would also suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. If you've already found you'd like to read his book, save yourself a search and give this scribed link a gander.
Read More2y ago The Hub
@Dr_Cockasaurus Time to buy more condoms and start reading kama sutra
2y ago The Hub
@CrispyCruiser I would actually appreciate it if you could critique me and let me know what I could improve on. I will definitely see her again because we are in the same kinda of social group.
2y ago The Hub
Edit: I should add that the last exchange between us when she asked me what was my impression of her. And I told her that I thought there was attraction between. Now I don’t know if that kills the feelings she has for me or not by becoming direct and not letting things flow naturally.
2y ago The Hub
Opened up to a girl on a first date
If someone could critique and tell me what I could do better I would really appreciate it.
First of all, I just wanna say that the girl is a 9 and before hand she told me she is depressed and I thought she might be looking for a “connection”. Fucking wrong.
Anyways, we did an activity together and after that I told her lets get drinks. But that didn't work and she took the lead and said lets go a walk. During the walk I opened hoping to find emotional connection with her. I became naïve and opened up to her and DID NOT turn things sexual. Fuck. I believed everything she told me about herself including the white lies (after the date it became clear what the lies were). Then we got in my car and I gave her subtle signs I wanted to kiss her, tries to put me in the friend zone me. Told her I can’t and she was genuinely shocked by this. She tells me we don’t have to be friends and just wants things to be the way they are now. I still refuse. After talking for a bit she leaves.
Later during the night, she calls me and does whatever it take to try and continue to be friends I still refuse. Send me a text saying she likes how I am honest and the way I don’t want to continue and appreciates it. Then agains text me and asks what my impression of her was. Blah blah blah.
I feel like I could have used that to my advantage and do something but beta me was operating. I feel like I hurt her ego but I don’t really care. I cut my losses and moved on.
How can I not become a beta for woman when they are in tough situations, really have to killed the captain save a hoe inside me. What can I improve on. I am more than happy to answer any questions you guys have for me to clarify the story.
Read More2y ago TheRedPill
I looked back at your posts and it is a bit hard to follow. Without knowing you, it would be silly to attempt advice.
What I gather from your first post is that you are trying to get laid. And there is plenty of advice out there for that.
If you want to live a good life, here are a few thoughts:
- Become better, and stronger, and smarter in every aspect of your life.
- Do not compare yourself to others - compare yourself to who you were last year. Act accordingly.
- Read "no more mr nice guy" by Dr Glover. Best thing I ever read.
- Let women chase you.
- Control your libido. And ignore the no fap bullshit. Fap if you must, but control yourself with women.
- YOU are the prize, not her. And if you are not a prize, then that is your problem.
- When you are young, life sucks. When you reach 40, life gets MUCH better if you are doing it right. You would not believe me if I explained it.
Good luck.
Read More2y ago TheRedPill
@deeplydisturbed Thanks for sharing your story, very insightful. I don’t personally know anyone like that. But if I did I would definitely be around them.
What would you advise me about my situation?
2y ago TheRedPill
I cannot speak for others, but whatever mental toughness I have, has come from a lifetime of enduring very bad situations: From an extremely difficult childhood, to slap happy Catholic school, to serving in the Infantry, to numerous street fights, to growing up in an area in which being a white boys was a minority, to two marriages (and divorces) plus a handful of epic eye-opening redpilling experiences with women, and perhaps most notably observing the women in my own family - all these things FORCED me to control my emotions and develop inner toughness.
The FAIL to do this would make me a target for predatory women (and perhaps others) for the rest of my life.
And that was NOT going to happen.
Reading countless stories of other men who experienced exactly what I did, and listening to their advice about how to handle my own thoughts was liberating beyond anything I can write here now.
Somehow I have been able to retain a goodness, wholesomeness and deep abiding affection for my children and the few close friends around me, while reserving small amounts of affection as a reward to my woman when she is good to me. The rest of me is apathetic hatred and repressed anger that few people will ever see. I prefer to keep it that way.
For some INSANE reason, the much younger woman I am currently dating refuses to leave and treats me like gold. All the things discussed in Red Pill forums here and there are helpful, but it is a deeper, inner mindset that works for me borne of the things I mention above.
Sure, being somewhat muscular and strong, being good with tools, former Military, well educated and having a good career all help for sure. But we all know many men who have a similar profile and are beta AF and shall always be.
TL;DR - Life's abuses are what developed mental toughness for me because I was too fucking stupid and cocky as a younger men to learn these lessons the right way - ie trusting older men who tried to warn me.
I listen to them now.
If you can avoid it, don't be like me. Listen to the older wiser men in your life. They can save you from untold grief and difficulties.
Read More2y ago TheRedPill
@carnold03 i will definitely read this book, thanks for recommending it to me
2y ago TheRedPill
@hustlerbear81 mental strength is something I wanted to gain all my life now that I see it in front of, it’s very bitter. And I see why it’s a skill that only a few men have. Also, the same goes for self love.