@AncientSpartan

Getting numbers constantly but can't close - what am I doing wrong?

27M bartender at a high volume sports bar in a major city in the USA. Tall, model level looks (not trolling or trying to be arrogant but I am a former model), white/chad archetype.

Not trying to brag but giving full context: I get hit on constantly at work. Girls flirting, laughing at my jokes, and I get at least one number per shift without even asking. They literally give ME their number.

Here's the problem - in 3 months working there, I haven't closed with a single one. Not one. Every plate I am currently spinning was obtained via cold approach at bars AS A CUSTOMER/Hinge/Tinder.

Is it just girls being tipsy and regretting it after? Because it's weird as fuck that they'd go out of their way to give me their number but then it fizzles out.

Example: last weekend got two cute blonde 20-somethings' numbers. We texted during and right after my shift, decent back and forth, then... nothing. Conversation dies. Deleted both numbers to move on.

I've been bartending for years and this keeps happening at this specific bar. Clearly I have the "on paper" stats - the initial attraction is there. So what's the issue?

Is my texting game shit? Am I not escalating fast enough? Not pushing for meetups soon enough?

Need actionable advice here because this pattern is getting frustrating.

It's probably for the best that fate's been oddly working against you to your benefit here. If the bars you work at are bad places to recruit new plates, then stick with ones where you're a patron.

Otherwise, consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.

@lambOfGod

Bitch being cold

So I had this plate for almost 2 months. First month, sex was great, made her cum and squirt countless time with my cock. She's been texting me good morning every day since we met up and we agreed to date exclusively to see where this goes.

For the last 2 weeks, this bitch started to tone herself down on the affection and excitement she's been offering me and always used to be very sexual with me on all media, including when we met up.

She rarely tells me anything sexually related and she has stopped initiating sex (she used to tell me how horny she was and that I should come over) and when I tell her something sexual, she just giggles or sends some bitch ass emojis.

My senses are on alert since I believe this bitch is seeing another fag. So I've started building up on leads, I have 2 girls I'm supposed to see this week behind her back. On the weekends if she doesn't come up with a proposal to come over or to see each other (because I'm the only one who initiated until now and I want to see if she does this) I'll go salsa dancing.

This bitch wants to text with me a lot, but I don't like this, since I want to fucking see her but I want to see if she can show interest by fucking initiating for once (she actually already did this in the past by telling me to come over or that we should see each other).

I started to withdraw my attention through texting and gone cold and she asked me what's wrong and why am I being cold. I told her I am not that talkative through texts. She responded by saying "is this a subtle way to tell me this because we haven't seen each other this week?". So this fucking bitch knows what's up but she does not want to act on it and see me. I went cold on her responding with "There are alternative ways to texting" she said "Ok" and I left her on read.

I am planning to not contact her until she either calls me or asks to see me. You have to understand that this bitch went from 24/7 horny sex to cold ass shit. So my bells instantly went on high alert.

I've already planned an aggressive hunt for girls until the end of the week by going out and OLD, to keep my mind off of her, fuck something else cause I have fucking needs, and build some other plates.

Am I fucking insane, clingy or controlling?

Honestly, if you haven't been physically violent with this chick, I'd just as soon write you off as just some idiot with one-itis and delusions of self worth. Six weeks with you is all this girl needed to lose her interest. Reads like you took it very poorly when you probably should've backed off and resumed dating other girls instead. As you plan to stop contacting her, it's probably for the best. Neither of you lose anything if you go your separate ways. It frees you to spend time on other people, things, and yourself.

In the meantime, consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.

@holiday

He has been DNA tested. That's what got me into this mess. I cut contact during the pregnancy and wasn't there for the birth, telling her I didn't want anything to do with her until the paternity test was done. This might normally make sense, but she was my first girlfriend from my teens who dumped me a few years ago, and I didn't do that because I genuinely doubted paternity - I was 99.9% sure the child was mine - I did it from some fucked up form of revenge, justified in my mind at the time for how she left me back when I was young. Now, we have been back together for 5 months, living together for 4.

Whoa... Ow... Well, you're still young and I fully expect you will do even dumber $#it in the years ahead, but I won't lie to you. That's definitely a darker summary than I'd otherwise have expected and not something I'd have recommended you do if you'd come to us sooner, but what's done is done.

The only way this could be more awkward, is if you two got married and she kept throwing it in your face how you shunned her when she was pregnant with your son every time you got into an argument. Regardless, make an effort to study the book, touch base with the married red pill guys and check out what they've written. Give yourself time to scrutinize and process all the information about to come your way. Try to make it a priority to make the best decisions that offer the best positive long term outcome for everyone involved in this situation.