Come here to ask any question you'd like. Advice, stories, suggestions, anything goes.
How do I stop getting triggered by women?
To make a long story short, I’m from a middle eastern Christian family. I got into depression out of college, had a few jobs, to constant fights with mother, and then had a accident, got into a coma for 2 years and woke up in 2020. I’m out of work because of that and am actively trying to find a job and trying to get my body in check; I’ve become a skinny husk as you can imagine. I always have had an absent in out fake alpha father and because of that, whatever stress my mother gets from him or from life, she puts it on me. The coma made me happy I didn’t get to put up with her shit but now it’s back at it again. I know I should find a place of my own and get a job to get away from this toxic garbage but how do you not get triggered by women? She literally starts fights and drama out of nothing, sublimates that worry and anxiety on me, and then pretends she didn’t do anything and is laughing watching dramas while I’m fuming with high blood pressure and eyes popping out and about to faint. This was understandable, though toxic, as a kid. I’m a fucking adult of 24 years of age and she’s conditioned me into being like this, being dragged into her fake drama bullshit just to rustle my jimmies and then goes around listening to music and laughing while I’m holding this L.
I’m this close to having a brain aneurysm and I need to find a coping mechanism to deal with her bullshit because I am seriously considering smashing my head against the concrete with her batshit insane fights that get me nowhere in life. How do you deal with someone who starts drama out of small things or trivial stuff just to make you upset? We are talking about straight up panic inducing verbal arguments. Car broke down? It’s ok, I’ll find another mechanic since the other one ghosted us. What she does? Lectures me and goes on a panic mode to trigger me, goes around in circles of topics that have no connection to each other, keeps hollaring at me what I’m going to do, gets me fuming and red in my face with eyes about to pop, and then tells me what’s wrong with you why are you upset?
I read enough books about how women literally toy with another man’s mental state, whether relatives or not but I literally don’t know how to deal with this when I don’t have another room to flee to or place to go since I’m doing side jobs online and applying. Like I need a mental tip how to deal with this insanity. I never asked to be born in such a broken household with such failure of a shit parentsRead More
Discovered TRP not long ago which helped me improve life situation but still remain very lonely and growing increasingly confused. I had to pay a whore to lose my virginity because i felt like it was a mental block and it only made it worse because it was a really subpar experience and once the rubber came on i felt literally 0 physical pleasure. Idk if its a weird fetish or what but i find most women more attractive while they are dressed, like if she has a nice body and is dressed well and i look at her i feel deep primal urge to want to fuck her but once i start thinking about the actual logistics of it i start losing interest and when i see a naked woman, this feeling is greatly diminished, unless she is very fit.
At this point i start to question how so many people are so obsessed with sex and it feels wrong but i don't feel like women are worth the effort unless it comes naturally to you. I think i rather just be single and focus on my hobbies and ignore women like i've done for all my life now as i don't have a fucking clue how to even make a step towards it anyways and it only inflicts pain. My father has on numerous occassions voiced that he is disappointed because i don't have a girlfriend and he wants grandchildren, thought i don't trouble myself too much with that as i am working at my own pace and my life situation is maybe not improving as fast as it should but i definitely am not ready for that and i'd need to get the opportunity in the first place, which at times feels impossible.
I get complimented on my looks (like my face) by older coworker women often and i also train a lot and have a better body than basically anyone i personally know but that does absolutely nothing when you dont know how to talk to women (but i do it because i love it, not for getting women).
Finding a sexual partner seems so hard and i have to wrap it anyways + as a man it seems you need to put in way more effort which makes it feel more like work and masturbation seems more pleasurable tbh? I've quit porn for 1-3 months before, no problem and i dont watch it that often. Maybe like 1-2 times a week. Half of the time i masturbate without porn. I lack confidence due to lack of experience and feeling inadequate and left too far behind.
Ive cold appeoached into a crash and burn in front of others a few times and it was pretty bad.
Feels like i am just spinning wheels and i am too retarded to understand this shit. Some people were lied to, others were oblivious to it but i think i am actually unsalvageably low social EQ or whatever the fuck you want to call it. Frustrating.
Reads like you're just a guy sorting himself out, who's not interested in a life of hedonism. There's nothing wrong with that. Put in the time to engage with other people and you'll likely find you're not alone. Continue to be friendly with your co-workers, you don't seem to have any negatives to share on that. If you've got hobbies that satisfy you, keep at them.
Remember the state of mind you had, the experience, how you felt after you were serviced by the whore and never forget it. If that doesn't inspire you to make an assessment of your love life with the goal of gradually improving it, nothing will. If your father asks you why you don't have a girlfriend, tell him point blankly, "Because you're not helping," and escalate by pointing out his failures to basically introduce you to women he thinks would be a good fit. Mothers don't seem to have a problem going to the meat market with a photo of their son in their purse, even when it embarrasses their son in absentia. If he is finding women that are at least pleasing to look at, why not ask them out and see what, if anything, happens. Yea, it might seem intrusive, but wimps and women whine and complain, warriors work out solutions to their problems.
Consider investing in a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, also known as the late Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's mirrored on several sites and a podcast. While his media is a bit pricey, it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from, but I would also suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. If you've already found you'd like to read his book, save yourself a search and give this scribed link a gander.Read More
Yo. Started new semester = new half year class with new people. Went home with girl after class to do homework, after that we went to her room after and after some time + tension she initiated, and I tried to escalate but she asked if we could just b friends. I said that I'd rather if we could b more than that, but friends was ok (since we're same class didnt wanna outright refuse), but we ended up making out for some time, but she had to go n I followed her halfway to the bus (my home direction anyway) we held hands n' when I said bye and left she called my name to make out in the middle of the road. Next class no teacher and we had alrdy decided to do it together. we met up at school but she said she was tired and wanted to do it at home (without directly inviting me) worst part I was not on my game that day at all, and also tired and should've went home or stayed at school to finish (but didn't) and even asked if we should do it at her place, she seemed tired and conflicted too. we touched and cuddled abit but didn't kiss and tension had definitely deescalated. we finished schoolwork pretty fast and I said she could sleep and I'd just go home. next class she was absent n i thought I'd try reaching out via text to gauge her interest which was completely ignored until hours later with just "no" prolly bad move, was purely impulse). anyway this story was just to give some context. what should i do next/monday? obv. didnt text her further, but should I try and defuse and stay as friends - although I'd rather get back to where we left it day 1 since we get along pretty well. but yea, how to handle this?
If you're really in college and still have the time to pursue females, then I'm disinclined to believe your studying a S.T.E.M. major related field and can only conclude that your diploma will have no discernible worth or value for you in the labor market when you graduate. Finish out the semester as best you can to preserve your GPA, update your resume, and start looking for a full-time summer job come around March. Work during the day, spit game at night, so you can do your sport f_cking while building up a nest egg for yourself while all the dumb kids come out of college with student loan debt. Use the summer break ahead to decide if you're going to go back and waste time, change majors to something with actual value, or keep working and make real professional progress with your life while scoring tail.
As for the female classmate, forget her. The female to male student ratio is insanely in your favor. The chicks increasingly outnumber the guys on college campuses, but that also means more chances of meeting crazy c_nts. If she's inconsistent in her behavior towards you, move on, focus your attention on another chick instead, but remain passively friendly towards the classmate in class.
Beyond that, consider investing in a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, also known as the late Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's mirrored on several sites and a podcast. While his media is a bit pricey, it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from, but I would also suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. If you've already found you'd like to read his book, save yourself a search and give this scribed link a gander.Read More
My question is this, I fucked a girl who does onlyfans like 4 times. I guess you can say she had burning desire to fuck me because it was very easy to hit like she chased me to do it. The thing is i never nutted from the sex so i stopped having sex with her but i still continue to chill with her. Lately i’ve been wanting to have sex again with her but i hesitate to start anything. I don’t know why because the sexual vibe is still there. I feel like i’m putting my self in the friendzone and i don’t like it. Is this just overthinking or am i right. If im right im just gonna ghost I don’t do the friendzone
@aweawea_ a I hear you, man. Sometimes shit feels pointless but it's your life. It's the only one you got so you gotta make the most of it.
Your sexual hang up's are all mental. You can go through therapy or work through it with self reflection and meditation.
You should also have or strive to have a passion or purpose in life. Some never find it but once you do your outlook will improve.
Your family and friends aren't you. When you realize that, you'll be alone for a bit but push past that. We're all alone and connected at the same time.
Hard to explain.
Finally, approaching is an art. Some have a skill, some have looks that help but you need to crash and burn many, many times before you can soar.
Go MGTOW if that's what you want but be honest with yourself and don't do it because that's all that's left and you've given up.Read More
@SwallowMyPill I'd start with putting more effort in how you write. It's the small things that add up. So, start there with that criticism. Your question is a step up from communicating with emojis.
Next, I'll summarize your post as "I didn't get laid".
You're not her gay best friend. This isn't a Rom com. Pull back and see if she chases.
She goes after you then you've got a shot. She doesn't then you're in her orbit. Distance further and game another chick, Romeo.
@Kt1910 Work and save. You sound young enough to pick up a trade or can go into post secondary.
Bite that pillow, swallow your pride. Her house. Her rules.
So, you need to move out. To do that you'll have to make more than you spend and have a nest egg.
When you get frustrated, use that anger to fuel your self growth. Hit the gym and/study.
Offset it with a constructive hobby.
Limit escapism to as close to nothing as possible.