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@INNASKILLZ2K20 I was dealing with a probably borderline chick last year. She would have like three projects going at once, was constantly dropping projects, starting new ones due to her partner for that project not working out, etc. I was just staying on 2 projects at any given moment and sometimes shelving one for another for a week or two. Just slow and steady. But it wasn't enough because I was lazy. Nobody works as hard as she does. So I would just see that over a short time she was all over the damn place. It never occurred to her "I've failed four times while being stressed and he is still on point".
Haha, mate I'm a bit of a 'sneakerhead'. I posted a Youtube review of an upcoming sneaker in the sneaker subreddit.
Apparently that's not allowed. The mod told me 'posting a photo of an upcoming shoe is different than posting your Youtube reviews'.
I told him the review is from a guy in New York, and I live in Australia and to substantiate his claim next time.
@INNASKILLZ2K20 Also my garage is only 6 minutes walk from my house. So that was a big one. Later when the borders are open my friend will be bringing tourists there. If I don't want to be there then I can just walk over 6 minutes to clean it up since its quite a hassle to make it perfect at the end of the night. It's not a huge amount of income so walking 15 minutes each way just to clean seemed pretty bullshit. Someday my woman will walk over there to clean.
Holy fuck dude, lmao.
The essential feature of borderlines is absolutely no emotional regulation.
They will totally collapse into a heightened emotion and keep creating a narrative that supports staying in the emotion.
'I feel so anxious. I have this, this, this, this and this going on. It's all so hard, and I don't know what to do. OMG I just have so much to do' etc.
It's like they're talking themselves further into the emotion.
They are SO difficult to work with, because often when you sit with them and explain tools they can use, or talk through the feelings, they don't take any of it on-board. They just REALLY like having someone outside of themselves giving them attention.
You have to have STRONG boundaries and continually ask them 'what are YOU going to do about it? What has worked in the past? How do you handle this feeling'?
It's constantly trying to spark the part of them which will start taking responsibility for their own emotional regulation.
This guy we had. Fuck me.
All he could say was 'this is so fucking hard, this place. I have outside financial issues, and you guys aren't doing your job, and what if I want to leave, and you guys are so tough...and, and, and, and'.
'Ok, buddy. But you got yourself through detox and into the program. You've survived two weeks. You definitely have the capacity to get through this'.
'Oh, oh yeah, you're right, haha...........but, it's really fucking hard, I don't like that other person, and I liked drinking more....and, and, and'.
Borderlines can drive you insane if you get sucked in.
They are a big focus in how I practice. We normally have at least one, or not huge amounts of time without them.
But, it can be fucking awesome when you see them suddenly 'click' and start sorting their shit out.Read More
@INNASKILLZ2K20 Also regarding cardio machines, I don't dislike them, it's just that it's unpleasantly boring after 15 minutes. I don't mind walking 15 minutes, but over 20 is annoying. From my rented apartment to my house under construction is 21 minutes or so. So it's right there. Then there is the drunken walking home distance and anything approaching 30 minutes is annoying, but 20 minutes or more is quite nice. I spent a bit more on my house to be closer to the two centers where I'm likely to be spending evenings when I'm out. If I was willing to go from a 25 minute walk to a 35 minute walk then my house would be finished already since I would have been able to buy a more renovated place. It just seemed too out there.