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Another valuable reason to limit red knighting your down bad blue pill friends, apart from them hating you for it, instead of being able to soberly see that you are actually the best help they have ever received, it's rather quite simple:
If it came down to it, they would absolutely throw you under the bus for mediocre pussy abusing them.
I have no doubt in my mind, after everything this friend experienced, dumped and all, that he would sacrifice me on the alter for mediocre snatch without a second thought
Don't red Knight your down bad friends. They are compromised as is. They would let a disrespectful bitch run your fate through their friendship than listen to any actual lifesaving advice
By modern standards, Lola is definitely a woman.
Unfortunately you just have to let them do what they're gonna do. You can't save them all
Everyone has heard of Captain save a hoe but honestly there are way too many captain save a bro situations that you shouldn't be getting yourself into
I would hate to see a friend off himself over a bitch but they will hate you for trying to save them.
I'm about close to losing this friend trying to help him. He asked me to keep certain women his ex was jealous of away from him and everything
Just to be mad at me for telling him the truth. In general avoid your compromised down bad friends. They will eventually disappoint you
Update 2:
We agreed to never exchange advice again
You cannot help down bad men. He got upset I spoke negatively of his ex, who he is determined to wait for as she samples cacks while he stays celibate for a relationship that is never coming back
You CANNOT help these men. That is the only reason I'm sharing this story. If you guys think you can red Knight your terminally down bad friends you are wrong
I knew this wouldn't work. I felt obligated to help him because he's been borderline suicidal about it. But beyond that I knew the end result would be agreeing not to talk about it
They will only hate you for being honest and they will seek bad advice because it feels good
Update on not red knighting your blue pill friends:
He's still too far gone. His ex girl is probably meeting and fucking other men as we speak because she wasn't fucking him for a few months and was going places without telling him where and he wasn't asking
She definitely isn't asexual and he is in denial that she will come back because her breakup spiel was "it's not you it's me and I need to work on myself first". Bro falls for literal womanese
I reached out to see if he's okay and he's texting female friends he knows apologizing for random shit and self destructing. I told him to stop and it and he just won't listen
Some men are just terminally down bad. You quite literally can't help them and it has deeply compromised them
God damn sums it up.
Too many small things that can't be mentioned without it turning into a novel.
The Reader's Digest version would be watching his passions and dreams being taken away.
Women really want the king who can order it done not the craftsman who gets it done. When you put it like that its obvious.
I don't know about that. My own woman appreciates the fact I'm fixing shit instead of throwing money at it like I did back when we first got together.
Treat 2 legged deer the same as the 4 legged kind. Take the first clear shot you are offered. Do not delay but do not rush the shot from nerves.
This may feel like no answer but it is the best I know. All that it requires is to be able to judge when a clear shot is offered. Here you have to be watching the quarry not yourself.
The usual advice to spot a clear shot is to read body language and so meeting her in person is the best thing you can do, then you can see what she really thinks about you. When to suggest meeting up with someone you talk to mostly on line? I appreciate that this is going to be hard if you are not actually speaking to her but is she open to you? Is she flirting or just seeking attention and compliments? Is she genuinely glad you responded to her? Does she talk about her body just in passing? This can be quite telling I have found. When they talk about more private issues with their body then its quite likely they are interested. Like for example her light jeans chafed her thighs on a hot day or she feels bloated because its that time of the month. They are not trying to turn you on with these slightly embarrassing things, they have just shown you that you are someone they feel who is allowed to know this stuff. She is not feeling sexy now but another time when you think she is, you might ask to meet. What is the body language of her snaps? Is she concerned what you might think of her, particularly her looks and behaviour around men? Does she find your jokes funny (here you need to be able to tell the on line difference between a whores laugh -where she laughs because it pleases men when girls laugh a bit submissively- and a real one)? Does she want to know all about you? Is she interested to know what your plans are?
I think this evidence based approach will lead to a better hit to shot ratio. I appreciate that there are the guys who go straight out to escalate with any girl who shows interest in knowing them but these guys waste a lot of time on failures. The girls they get tend to be the easier trashier ones who don't mind going with random guys who escalate. I would try to keep things as natural as possible. If there is a rapport and she is acting like she might be open to you, then look further.
The advantage on your online presence is the exposure to a large number of females. The ease of access does mean you need more vetting not less, more time sifting randoms till they are not quite so random. Or else you will have to just be an absolute stand out Chad n your profile and be purely interested in sex and not care about any sort of compatibility.
Read Morehow do you avoid these emotionally draining situationships.
Simple. Don't have sex with a man without commitment. Ideally, that commitment is in the form of marriage. The men who want nothing serious will leave, and those that do want something serious will stay.
Also, universal advice for men and women is to not emotionally invest in someone who is not reciprocating. It certainly happens with many young men who are struggling just to get a date, though I think the same applies to women who need to filter out men who are only looking for sex.
Another thing, women who complain about men only wanting them for sex need to ask themselves what do they offer a man besides sex. Their answers should be things men actually want, not selling something to them that men are not asking for. And these women also need to determine what their selection criteria is for a man. If it is as superficial as him being tall and good looking, consider how many other women also want that same man. Would such a man want to commit to you? How realistic are you about what kind of man you should expect to want to commit to you?
Read More@SwarmShawarma Fixing removes the dopamine hit of shopping or of being given a new thing (and women do love that don't they).
In my lady's case I can't think of anything big or clever I have fixed that has disappointed but a list of minor disapointments are;
She was disappointed when the oven door could be fixed by tapping another hole to screw another catch in and buying a replacement seal. She has really hoped for a new oven but oven heats food, so what is the problem?
Soldering some wires in her lap top meant she didn't get a new one.
She would like a new gate but I keep repairing the existing one (which in fairness does look a little old).
She would have liked new taps but the old ones only needed the seats grinding and new washers.
She assumes a new vacuum will clean better but really she just has to get all the crap clogging the existing one out and clean the filter.
She has had it in for my old Oak kitchen table since she arrived. It was my parents and it was antique when they had it. It is a rustic oak table. Nothing fancy, plenty of minor knocks. It is not going to be thrown out. Attempting to compromise I sanded it down and treated it with silvered oil to kill bacteria. It is tolerated (just).
Many complaints have been levelled at my hand made mahogany bed and I have variously assaulted it to stop the most minor squeaks. Its not going. She has in the past admitted the truth that she really does not like it because its a wooden bed. She associates a wooden bed with being a hick. She wants a smart urban bed. Should have got a smart urban gent then.
A new conservatory would be a lot better in her mind than fixing the lead flashing and the brackets that hold the panels in.
If the television were bigger I think there would be no complaints about my fixing the aerial from time to time but she insists the TV is broken and we need a new bigger one to fix reception. (This amuses me more than perhaps it should).
She wanted a new front door like some other houses in the street have when the lock broke but I just changed the lock (not that that really even qualifies as a repair).
One that I did win was that she was constantly telling me to throw out an 18th century mahogany table that was water stained. I refused and simply sanded it many times with decreasing grit sizes and applied finishing oil. It is as smooth as french polish. She now loves it. In fact she likes to tell people that she sanded it because she tried to help a few times.
Read More