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@carnold03 I’d use the term crowd loosely lol I have no friends locally. My primary source of meeting women outside of dating apps is the dog park or the bar when a friend visits
Should i ghost her or act like nothing happen?
Made a terrible mistake despite the AWALT mentality.
I've been dating this girl for 2 weeks (we haven't had sex yet, since it's only been a coffee date). She clearly is into me and she knew i'm into her but last night she got drunk with 4 guys and 2 girls. She said she doesn't remember how she got home someone "dropped her off." She didn't call or message me afterward and kept apologizing when I answered her call, especially after hearing my aloof tone.
She knows what she did is a red flag drinking with 4 men. She's a 9/10, and those guys were flirting with her. I'm pretty sure she's flirting back, given her attitude. And I suspect she might have hooked up with someone that night.
Now, should I ghost her or just act like nothing happened and keep her as a "plate"? The thing is, I already sent her a LTR beta cuck provider signal, so I don't think i can just plate her easily.
Consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.
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haha no not a bitter incel. I guess my point is that being in red pill for 11+ years, I’ve accomplished everything that is preached and you’d think it would make dating a breeze. It in fact, does not
I speculate having a higher SMV just opens the door to better looking girls, you still get the same treatment tho
With the circles you're running in, everyone has options, but what blows my mind about the 7-up crowd is that delusion isn't applicable to them. A lot of them are clearly insane. Regardless, I'm hopeful that you'll find someone who's a good fit, but I won't blow smoke up your @$$ denying that it may be a while yet until you find each other.
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@Bozza yep. Arguably worse, in some ways. Average girls have delusional standards - imagine what a 10 has
@Bozza Before I got to the RP I was listening to RSD, and there was this thing that was RP - regarding
You get more success, but you also get more problems.
"You will always get problems, but the quality of the problem will change" - it sticks with me.
I speculate having a higher SMV just opens the door to better looking girls, you still get the same treatment tho
You get more success, but you also get more problems.
For me it's always been akin to "water, water everywhere but not a drop to drink".
Finding attractive women is easy, getting laid is easy. Finding one you actually want to date - incredibly rare.
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@carnold03 haha no not a bitter incel. I guess my point is that being in red pill for 11+ years, I’ve accomplished everything that is preached and you’d think it would make dating a breeze. It in fact, does not
I speculate having a higher SMV just opens the door to better looking girls, you still get the same treatment tho
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What would cause this gal to flake and ghost?
Been seeing a gal, 9/10 by any standard (I only mention that becuase I know she has unlimited options), expressed extremely high interest from date 1.
- She Initiated a kiss and holding hands half way thru date one
- Hooked up date 2
- Bought me a gift by date 3 and talked about where she wanted to travel to together
- Date 4, we watched a movie, hooked up, she helped me pick out furniture for my house, she cooked for me and we made plans to hangout today.
Last date was Thursday, today rolls around and I haven’t heard from her even 4 hours after the planned date time. Just zero contact since Friday.
Should I continue waiting for her and not reach out? My assumption is always that there is another guy she met but it’s so far outta left field, as fickle and fleeting as I know women are. I’d be hard fetched to believe she found anyone better on paper.
Not to toot my own horn but I’m 6’2, bodybuild, drive a brand new McLaren and have my own house at 27. I just can’t see how she’d be so inclined to be open to meeting anyone else, let alone finding better (on paper, I know its all about how a guy makes her feel emotionally regardless of accolades)
That last paragraph gave me some subtle Elliot Rodger vibes. Regardless, you already mentioned she had other options. She likely chose to pursue them. Fortunately for you, this has given you the freedom of conscience to pursue your own. Drive your supercars because you enjoy doing it and interacting with like-minded people who share such a hobby. Treat the females such cars may draw in as a nice convenience, but don't go expecting too much from their sort.
Study the book. She had her chance and blew it. It doesn't matter why she flaked, only that she did. As I've said before, "Better to find out you're not a good fit with each other as soon as possible, than after several years of marriage with children."
Read MoreHey y’all , still new to this whole thing. I’ve been working on SMV and have made some progress. I'm currently stuck in a shitty mindset and wondering how I can try and get out of it.
The Virginity mindset. I’ve been alone so long I had given up and just accepted I’ll be a virgin the rest of my life. I’ve since then decided fuck it, I’ll give it a try anyway and see how it goes. I’ve joined a bunch of social clubs, been lifting, etc. my SMV isn’t as bad but it’s still low. So I thought doing stuff I haven’t before would give me a sense of identity but no matter what I try I still think of myself first and foremost as a virgin. This isn’t intentional, but it’s still kinda killing me inside despite me trying to either stop thinking about it or change what I’m thinking about. I thought being consistent with working out would cure it, or at least reduce it, but it hasn’t. This bleeds into my confidence and drive. What really gets me is that there's a lot of things that I can fix about myself, but virginity is only something I can fix if I have someone else. I’ve noticed my confidence in general is very unstable, as in fluctuates day to day, in line with my depression, as some days I struggle to get out of bed and have a reason to live/ keep going. I want to change how I view myself, but I haven’t reached a point where I enjoy anything. I don’t have anything I want to work towards besides getting laid, and I feel like this is very counter productive as I’ll never have sex when I identify as a virgin and am not interested in anything beyond sex. I hate myself less now that I’m trying to take care of myself, but I feel like I went from 100% bad to 70% bad. How do I develop self confidence if I still hate what I am, while no idea what I want to be? Feels like a catch 22.
Self Answer: While it hasn’t helped so far, I think I need to keep trying hobbies, and continue lifting. It could just be taking a long time since I spent so long in a state of self hate. If I try a variety of things, maybe I’ll find something that I enjoy and can turn into a passion/ long term hobby.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtwiAkUj5Go
If this was about getting laid, you'd have simply gone to a red light district, dropped some cash for a pros service, and been done with it. This reads as being something fundamentally different from a mindset or purpose issue, but a self-confidence issue. Self-confidence usually grows as a result of pursuing and overcoming the various challenges of life. During which time, you come to understand what interests, drives, and motivates you. To that end, I suggest that you get yourself two sheets of paper and a pen.
On the first sheet write down a list of things that you've been putting off on the back burner due to work, schooling, or just life in general. It doesn't matter how silly, or stupid the task or idea might be, just write it down. When you're done, take the second sheet of paper, and re-write the items from the first list starting with what you believe to be the simplest, easiest task, to the most complicated.
When you're done with the second list, study the book, and get to work. The challenge once you've got the list done won't be simply accomplishing them, but not allowing yourself to be de-spirited whenever you encounter difficulty, or failure. Basically, to not let yourself be defeated. You'll spend the time to troubleshoot and diagnose the problem, then start over. If you need help, ask. There's no shortage of #books we can recommend that may help you achieve your goal.
Best of luck to you.
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